Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Support Group
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a psychiatric disorder, more specifically, an anxiety disorder. OCD is manifested in a variety of forms, but is most commonly characterized by a subject's obsessive (repetitive, distressing, intrusive) thoughts and related compulsions (tasks or rituals) which attempt to neutralize the obsessions.
Do some of you feel that you have primary OCD and secondary? I ask becasue with some things, I feel pretty "mild". Like handwashing. I have to wash my hands after I come home from gym, shopping, before eating, after touching certain things, people, etc. However, if for some reason I didn't I would be grossed out but not "freak out". Also, with my cans and labels. If they aren't perfect I can go on to something else. I will eventually go back and fix but I don't feel compelled to have to do it right at that moment, just as soon as I get a chance. However, with my food. If I don't know the calorie count, etc and have planned it into my meals, then I absolutely cannot eat it. It would drive me crazy. I also can't miss a workout. To do so would send me over the edge. I have to have very specific foods. Example, I could never just eat an apple. It HAS to be organic or I cannot stomach it. The holidays are horrible as I can't go to social functions unless I don't eat or bring my own food. Needless to say, I isolate A LOT. I even eat the same foods almost all the time. Good, healthy, clean foods that make me feel really good. EXCEPT for the isolation and sometimes I feel that I want something else but it is too much effort to try to wrap my mind around it. I woudl love a glass of egg nog. BUT I would have to substitute something else in order to add to my diet and it's so high caloric, that it would practically take out another meal that I just don't find it's worth it. I just wish I could drink a glass without the anxitety. However, I am fine pouring a glass for my daughter. This also just seems to get worse and worse. My calorie counts continue to get smaller and smaller and my workouts get longer and longer. I feel trapped. I worry too that some of the more "mild" issues will eventually increase. Does anyone relate? Thanks!
Your anxiety around exercise and caloric intake would cause me to look at body dysmorphic disorder as a concurrent 'malady' with your OCD.
Mybeach is more concerned about the state of foods - types, calorie count, health. It would be sooner linked to EDNOS (eating disorder non otherwise specified).
I'm not a doctor, but I'm a psychology student so we have studied all of this.
Mybeach, I think you should definitely see someone about this. A psychologist would be great. It may also help to see a nutritionist who can give you the absolute facts on what your body needs and the real contents of foods. It may help?
EDNOS is a weak cop-out that seems to have come to fruition in the DSM over the last few years trying to pathologize every form of behaviour. Also she doesn't state anything about the low self esteem associated with eating disorders. If she was male we would probably label with MDD.
Mind you I think we are splitting hairs here.
again, thanks for the comments and support. It is nice to know that some people do understand and maybe we dont' all relate the same way, but we all emphathize with each other!
I think many of us have had experience with therapists that suck really bad. I know that I did! Luckily I got a new one, and it was amazing. I think you just have to keep trying until you find the one who fits you. Maybe try that? There are some really helpful people out there.
Now I am at a healthy weight. I still look good, still work out, but NO LONGER OBSESS about it. Maybe that will be encouragement to you that you can hopefully move past these obsessions and receive healing from your disorders, and you can still LOOK GOOD. I'm sorry that you are under so much stress from all of this. I know the feeling. Others didn't understand (so I didn't really talk to others about it). I felt really alone in that time. Please know we are here for you. I wish I could have had a counselor then. I'm sorry to hear your counselor is so bad now. I encourage you to find a new one, one who acutally understand the issues you are dealing with. I wish the best for you.
Now that I have moved past that stage of my life, I am on a journey to find the real value INSIDE of myself. Through this process, I am learning to like myself and I am learnig a lot about who I am. I am finding that this process is WAY MORE BENEFICIAL for me to feel good about myself then obsessing about the food I eat and how much I work out. Have a happy new year!
The support really means a lot and it does help to know that there may be hope, someday. I wish I could forget the numbers, etc. I had gum surgery last week and they wouldn't let me exercise for 2 days, I felt horrible and compensated by reducing my calories. I am limited on a number of things I can eat anyway but since I dropped the calories, I am struggleing so much with bringing them back up. It's like with burning calories I keep trying to burn one more calorie every day it seems and over time, it really begins to get high and with eating, just the opposite. Once I eat less it's hard to eat more the next day. I have lost about 2 lbs in the past couple of weeks and for most that is not a lot. But I am already underweight.
I also relate to the loss of periods, I haven't had mine in over 2 years. UGH.
Again, thanks to all for the responses and support. I am struggleing but I will find my inner strength and get out of this rut, sooner rather than later.