Hi, I'm writing to say that in the past month of July and beginning of August, I have not being doing good. Me and my family feel the OCD is getting worse for me. I've had continual trouble with the bathroom rituals, particularly my compulsive out of control, screaming and grunting; otherwise my word for straining and I am also rubbing my butt against the toilet seat. I think this compulsion is totally disgusting and unneccessary. I have been trying to overcome, control and stop this ritual pearmenetely since 2008 when I first had displayed OCD symptoms. Some of the other areas I struggle with are excessive toothbrushing, using excessive amounts of facewash, taking long showers and baths, still somewhat excessive with shaving, excessive shampoo and condithioner use. When taking showers; having to wash/use soap on my body more than once, at least 3 times. I also have this ritual where whenever I get a string of hair from my head or somewhere else on my body, particularly my fingers, I have to remove or get rid of it right away. I think it's really gross and itchy when I get hair on my fingers and anywhere else on my body. I am also obsessive with having to use more than two towels to dry off after a shower or bath, which I take a longtime with. I scratch and pick my skin like everyday, which myself and my family gets irritated at me doing, I also nailbite and pull my hangnails, make myself bleed, which is very painful which I've tried to stop doing my whole life. I have a strage ritual where I count how many hours between using the toilet. Lastly, I have this new compulsion where I count how many sips of water, I drink from a bottle of water at night. I know, sometimes I feel out of control, like alot lately. I am thankful for having a very good, helpful and understanding psycologist, a nice caseworker and a wonderful new psychiatrist who has been very helpful in trying to find the right medication for OCD and educate me and my parents about psychiatric medications and treatment for OCD. I saw my psychiatrist yesterday and he still has me taking 50 mg of Zoloft. The Zoloft helps me out somewhat with the OCD thoughts, even though lately it has not been that great, because the Zoloft is not at therepeutic 200mg level yet. I am still doing alot of the obsessions and compulsions. I have also tried 0.5mg of Lorazepam, an anxiety medication. I only have taken it twice since he prescribed it. Both times I felt sleepy and very unmotivated. He said is not worried about the unmotivation at this time.My OCD is very frustrating for me and my family. I am sorry to sound like I have a million problems with the OCD. Sometimes, I feel so lost sometimes, though I know I can overcome this illness with some patience, hardwork, persistance, having faith in myself and help from medication and my doctors. Me and my parents were considering a hospital psychiatric inpatient program. My psychiatrist said no to the idea, because I'm not hurting myself, I'm not a danger to others and I'm not suicidal. He says until those things happen, he wants me to stay at home and work on getting well. I hope that my OCD symptoms will improve by next appointment in 2 weeks. I also am hoping that the OCD will not cause me so many problems the rest of August. Lastly, I truly am hoping to feel better soon. I wish for everyone to have a great rest of August. Enjoy Summer.

Take Care,

Silkroad