Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) Support Group
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a psychiatric disorder, more specifically, an anxiety disorder. OCD is manifested in a variety of forms, but is most commonly characterized by a subject's obsessive (repetitive, distressing, intrusive) thoughts and related compulsions (tasks or rituals) which attempt to neutralize the obsessions.
It's like I love being like this.. i sit in my room, struggle.. and have to force myself to get out of bed.. the sad thing is... i can't even sleep.. its more of a pain mental/physical..
I never had to deeal with depression like this before the age of 19.. and it's a pity... Im 21 about to be 22 and it's just as bad as ever. I just want to give up.. but i dont? I want to quit.. but I am so afraid of death... I sit on face book and stare... constantly at it and my phone.. wanted to ask someone for help.. or even call my mother who is far away in another state.. but i never do. I procrastinate, i was a heavy drug addict . and a complete fuck up. regardless to what all of you think or say.. I have fucked up so many times.. it's sickening.. School, work, new trades... air force, life.. i am nothing but a disappointment. I still live at home with my father who loves me.. but i can never talk to him..
A few weeks ago i overdosed and blacked out.. ended up getting arrested with pills and was in a coma... i have court cases... im a pathetic guy who will nevvver get it right. i lose everything i care for.. and i push everyone away.
i want to delete this... but im not.. i dont feel like writing anything more.. it sickens me
I never had to deeal with depression like this before the age of 19.. and it's a pity... Im 21 about to be 22 and it's just as bad as ever. I just want to give up.. but i dont? I want to quit.. but I am so afraid of death... I sit on face book and stare... constantly at it and my phone.. wanted to ask someone for help.. or even call my mother who is far away in another state.. but i never do. I procrastinate, i was a heavy drug addict . and a complete fuck up. regardless to what all of you think or say.. I have fucked up so many times.. it's sickening.. School, work, new trades... air force, life.. i am nothing but a disappointment. I still live at home with my father who loves me.. but i can never talk to him..
A few weeks ago i overdosed and blacked out.. ended up getting arrested with pills and was in a coma... i have court cases... im a pathetic guy who will nevvver get it right. i lose everything i care for.. and i push everyone away.
i want to delete this... but im not.. i dont feel like writing anything more.. it sickens me
I just got NUMB. Consumed in my own head.. and I shut down completely. I live with my family and I told my sister who I live with about how I've been feeling and my OCD/anxiety but I could only discuss so much before I know she will get tired of it and annoyed so I stopped talking completely and locked myself up with my issues which has been so difficult for me because it makes me feel so alone with these thoughts. Which is hell. I can't talk to anyone because I am unable to focus on anything.. ): My boyfriend is in the military and he doesn't know about all this. I'm scared to tell him because I don't want to loose him. I pushed so many people away these past few months and I don't want to loose my relationships. I've gotten so depressed over it I started blaming myself but I'm trying to convince myself its not my fault.. its not our fault. I'm 21 years old turning 22 too this year too. I used to be a happy energetic spontaneous girl who loved life and so excited about the future.. I just don't know what went wrong. And why I just can't be happy.. and why I can't stop worrying about EVERYTHING and doubting myself.
I'm working on my last semester at my community college before I transfer and the pressure to do well on this semester.. has made my anxiety/ocd worse. I'm talking to a school counselor tonight and hoping she can give me some advice or refer me to a place where I can find help. You really should do the same ):
I know it's hard but we gotta force ourselves to get up, and do something about the way we feel or we'll just get in deeper.
Trust me, it's been hard for me to even get up even the morning and EAT nonetheless get up and go school and such. But I want to beat this and I want you too. If you need to talk, just message me.