Ugh hope he has no hope of enforcing that nonsense?

Great that your spirit is strong and well able for his crap..

Also good to hear that you're whizzing around...much better than being static :)

I've been coming across a lot of stuff about abundance and living in the now..it really does help to leave them behind in the now..regardless of how much they keep trying to intrude on our peace?

The one thing we can claim..is peace in our present moment..and its the biggest F you we can also give them..

Hope that you can keep on being you..strong free and unhindered by him..

Wishing you the continued strength needed to combat that idiot. Will check in to see your update. You are such a fighter . . . hold your head up high. Hugs.

What a douche. And just what does he think he's going to do to get you out 'asap'? More manipulation. Keep hanging on! Good thing we all have that skin on our teeth.

dadda,

I am glad that you are doing well enough! Was the trooper cute at least? The last time I got pulled over my registration was overdue (by one day) I told him I was coming back from visiting family and happen to mention that I also knew that my head light was out. 3 kids and a dog in the car and packed full from Christmas I got a warning and a letter asking for proof within 48 hrs that all the work was done. He wrote it up as a blown head light, as he didn't notice that. Saved me LOTS of money and time.

and how many months have gone by to add up to $9000. Every month he can just keep adding. and you can just keep living. Whatever is my attitude of the day. Not healthy really, but it is what keeps me going.

Also been using sleeping meds. OMG, how much better the day can be when you sleep at night, uninterrupted for 8 hrs. I know you work early mornings, but you should think about it, even if you have to go to bed at 6pm. The sleep rally helps.

I agree with nursemom, he is a douche. (funny, boy asked what that was today when I called someone it out loud without thinking... told him that is a conversation for when he is older... MUCH older)

Yes, he is a douche! I am tired! I am not sure how much a fighter I am ... I left here first time with very little. Certainly not anything resembling equitable settlement. Normally, I fight, if I fight at all, for others ... because injustice and wrong make me angry. I don't normally fight, for myself. But it does make me angry, because all I merely asked for, wanted and expected was a little time to do things rationally and without hardship. This guy could have KEPT the house and ALL the equity ... that is the thing, I guess that blows my mind ... he is so focused on destroying me or tormenting me ... that he DOESN'T CARE what happens to our daughters as a result (youngest likely will have to file for bankruptcy ... at 20!!) and he doesn't care what he loses ... because he never expects that he will/can! And it has hit me how much this *person* has benefited as a result of their "relationship" to me. I might be down, but repayment of evil for good ... not a pretty sight, in the end.

I'm sorry Dadda. So many things are stacked against us in getting to any kind of even equitable, reasonable solution. I also lost almost everything and came near to filing for bankruptcy. I had to get help to live. Let's just say I was Googling homeless shelters just in case at one point. But I share custody of my kids and that is all that really matters now.

I used to say I had a 563 item "to do" list, so I understand the whirlwind you're going through. It may feel like you'll never get through it, but one day, you'll realize you're near the end of the list and you see light at the end of the tunnel.

Not a lawyer, but I don't think anyone is going to physically force you out of a house you are part owner in. Like I don't think you can be evicted. He may just be trying to terrorize you, by frequently sending you those messages. Or he may be trying to lay a paper trail. But a paper trail would more likely be a certified letter. Not even sure text messages are legally admissable as they are hard to save with date/time/recipient stamps, etc.

It sounds like you are trying to be amused by it all, and that's one of the best defenses. At least I did not lose my sense of humor, though it got a bit cynical at times.

Thanks, Escape! He just came storming in here, with his camera phone, taking pictures and demanding I get out ... when our oldest daughter (home) confronted him, he ordered her out and told her "she just lost her phone". Piece of crap. I told him he DOESN'T live here and he needed to leave ... he just continued through, stating he needs to clear out HIS bedroom. I am going to try to file a report, though I am SURE the police will tell me it is a civil matter. I'm going to try to find out who the probation officer is and if he is ALLOWED to come and do all of what he is!

My daughter was pretty upset ... he borrowed $50 from her, and "spent it on lottery tickets" right in front of her. She also has a $350 bill for school that I'm not able to help with at the moment. I guess I should be "happy" at least he isn't to the point of killing me yet ... as he apparently has hope of intimidating or using the Court process against me. Though I'm not paranoid, I am convinced that he does not intend to do what the Court ordered and I do believe ... that puts me at some level of danger.

You're smart and strong and you can and will get through this.

All those F5's will make the final control alt delete he'll get in return that much sweeter. I'm picturing him at his keyboard, viciously pounding, digging his hole deeper with each keystroke. You, on the other hand, have your nose to the grindstone, are on the right path, and eventually will enjoy the benefits of all your hard work and doing the right thing, against all odds.

Guess I get to fill out ALL THAT PAPERWORK again for a PO ... yay. I had to leave a message as the probation officer wasn't in ... had to call police twice today, as I wanted to report the first time, then later I looked up and saw him walking around the back of the house. There was a white van parked in front (nurse has one, but not positive it's hers ... will have to compare old pix with the ones from today). So I got to run around for several hours ... found out he is suing me in small claims for $9000 for "non-payment of rent". He claims there was an "agreement" made on November 20; this seems to consist of his attorney's letter to mine that he would no longer pay the mortgage and utilities ... and has unilaterally decided the "rent" is $1000 a month .... what a disaster ... I feel like I am being tortured.

But at least I DID speak with the realtor, who told me he signed a ONE YEAR selling agreement; also that we can ONLY sell the house for the highest appraised value, b/c the judge (supposedly) "said so". I was there, the judge said NO such thing.

I can't imagine WHY I am so honored to have these experiences ... LOL

And the craziness continues . . . so sorry you have to deal with all this. So overwhelming!! and So crazy!!! Just know we all care. Hugs, friend.

Oh my gosh, dadda! He is losing it. I'm so sorry you have to go through this. You and the kids must be on edge wondering when the lunatic is going to pop in. I hope the PO goes through.

Maybe I won't get one quite yet ... I posted video on my FB before ... I have another recording owith him yelling, "F the judge ... he can just come look for me". I found my recordings ... I moved all the stuff on computer so I had to look ... but I also CONFIRMED that the nurse, who is so "scared" to death of me that she filed that fake restraining order against me, then got two last minute continuances, knowing the evidence would have torn apart her lies, IS the one who was in MY driveway yesterday, while MY ex-husband yelled out more harassment and etc. The woman who sent my children $25 gift certificates ... I'm sure that will make up to the daughter facing bankruptcy ...

HE is going to screw HIMSELF at some point. Hopefully someone in authority will catch it ... I've come to realize that you can't be all there (I am not referring to "crazy" as much as grandiose) to be on probation and start all the same garbage up all over again.

Dadda I am sorry to hear that this N never leave you alone. Gosh he is so N, he keeps adding money he thinks you own him. How narcissist he is! He never gives up. Next month it will be 10,000! I am glad to see that you are strong. Yes he wants to keep torturing and tormenting you. Be strong me dear . Hugs!!

Yes, next month it WILL be $10,000. Maybe I should just spend the next month learning how to file a tort motion for damages and intentional infliction of emotional and other injuries and joinder his mother and all else into it ... thank you, I need the hugs ... this is the stuff VERY BAD movies are made of (or books)!

Dadda,

I'm confused. Why would you BOTH not have to sign the house sale contract? And in this market, the pricing has to be flexible -- test a higher amount and then drop it if you don't get bites in a reasonable time. Otherwise the realtors stop showing it because it's overpriced. You can see that with low traffic as the realtor should be able to tell you how many people look at it, say each week. I would keep in regular contact with the realtor, even if for some reason he is her only client. You have a legal stake in the house sale and as long as you are cooperative with the realtor, there is no reason for her not to share info with you.

During my divorce, plenty of times, my ex did not respond at all to letters sent by my lawyer. That does not constitute an agreement unless he has the unilateral power to decree how something will be. My lawyer told me you do not have to respond to everything and often people don't. It doesn't mean anything.

As for small claims court, it may be different in different locales, but usually there is a fairly small limit on the amounts that can be obtained, like maybe $1,500 or $2,500 max. And the arguments are much more common man, reasonable, with documentation; rather than legal like with lawyers. You do not have lawyers in small claims court. Often the judge will just split the difference in some way if that is possible. So, given that his claim sounds pretty spurious, and the max is much lower than what he is asking for, I would not worry too much about it. It sounds like he's really reaching and just trying to cause trouble in any venue he can.