thankyou for sharing this it might just help us remember that we are not forever stained with the putrid that was put on us by those monsters

Great post! I love to learn to see things from a different perspective, and this is an incredibly encouraging one. I think it should be printed out and given by every therapist to every client as a piece of support during their healing.

Love it!

I see your point, but for me, things like this are oversimplifying and invalidating. I think it's because, I've suffered so much damage, I am never going to completely heal from some of it. And I know that. It's just a fact for me. As for the DNA, it does change slightly each time a cell regenerates. Kind of like making photo or audio copies. If you keep copying the copy, eventually it gets glitches in it here and there. Same thing with our bodies, until they finally die.

The same is also true with our memories. Our everyday experiences indirectly effect our DNA. That is why sometimes people don't ever recover from amnesia, for instance. That is because, when we have an exceptionally stressing experience, good or bad, it causes biochemical changes even at the DNA level. If that stress is too great or occurs over a long period of time, it will cause cell damage, including the DNA if the cell is damaged enough. For instance, prolonged stress causes a raise in corticosteroid levels, which raises your blood sugar level. Over time, that can contribute to causing type II diabetes.

Also, the nerve and brain cells do not ever replicate. That is how we learn new things and retain information. We''re stuck with the ones we we've got. So we gotta take care of 'em!!

Starfish, no offense but that sounds to me to be a self defeatist attitude.Self defeatism is a very common side effect of being abused so it's understandable.If you had a therapist tell you that concerning not being fully able to heal then I would seriously consider changing therapists.After all if one alter can heal they all can heal.I myself have had 91 alters emerge so far. My childhood was a seemingly endless hell of my father,5 of my uncles as well as their family friends sexually abusing me and my mother emotionally and physically abusing me on a daily basis. So I too am no stranger to massive amounts of trauma but I would never say I am too damaged to recover. That would be admitting defeat and letting my abusers win and that is never going to happen to me again.

I so enjoyed this inspiring post of yours, Wheezie. It's terrific! Thank you.

Well, I disagree, but that's ok. Everyone has their own experiences, and their own interpretations and opinions about them. I did not say a therapist told me that some psychological wounds wil not heal. That is something you came up with, and therefore, something you would probably benefit from exploring why you thought I said it. In my opinion, psychological injuries are just like physical ones. Many, if not most, heal on their own with simple care. Others need special medication, physical therapy, or even surgery. or several surgeries. And some, are so devastating, a person just is never the same again. Or who they would have been to begin with. That's why I said, "for me"....and for me, that is true. What I said about DNA is what I learned in nursing school. Now, it's quite possible I didn't remember it accurately. But that also is true for everyone.

In my opinion, the attitude of my previous reply is a logical and realistic one. And TO ME, saying that some of the damage I received from some of my abuse I know I will not recover from is not admitting defeat. To me, it is admitting the truth about the situation. To me, letting my abusers win would be not accepting or dealing the ugliest part of my truth. Which may or may not have caused permanent damage. If you have not had that happen, it does NOT mean that can't happen to anyone.

I think much of the disagreement lies in symantics: how each person defines healing.

For me, healing doesn't mean forgetting or feeling fine with what happened. It doesn't mean forgiving those who caused pain intentionally. Those things will never happen, and I'm okay with that.

On the other side, for me healing is understanding what happened that has affected my life so much, and deciding what parts I want it to keep affecting, and what parts of the present I want to change so that they become MY decision, not driven by fear instilled by my past.

So, for me anyway, I think you're both right.

Well said, W!!

I have read a few journal post on here in which people have said that their therapists have told them that exact sentiment. That they have been through so much trauma they will never completely recover. It seems clear to me that these therapist have issues to deal with themselves if they are telling their clients this.I have also read in numerous articles(by psychiatrist and psychologist) that the main reason many therapist do get in to this field is because of their own issues.Here's an excerpt from one such psychologist saying just that.

Since doctors choose their occupation because of traumatic childhood, it is essential that doctors identify the subconscious motivators and deal with them before trying to help others. The therapist's inability to resolve her own problems is harmful to both her and her patients. Most alcohol, drug, and sex awareness educators are drawn to these helping jobs because of childhood sexual abuse. The professionals may have overcome the consequences of their childhood abuse in some areas, but may have developed harmful habits or addictions. Some helpers have compensated for their alcoholism with workaholism, some have dealt with their unconsciously remembered traumas by expressing them through the pain of patients, and some have subconsciously transformed their forgotten childhood abuse into child protection. The old traumas have not been resolved despite being masked by semblance of normal behaviors. Unlike prostitutes, whose occupation clearly points at incest and serious psychological problems with personal worth and boundaries, doctors appear mentally healthy. Interestingly, almost every nurse or doctor exhibits plentiful symptoms of incest along with neuropsychological consequences that lead to psychopathology.

This would explain why so many in the mental health profession are prejudicial to people with DID and it also explains why the mental health profession are one of the leading contibuters to secondary victimization.Here's an excerpt from a study showing just that.

The majority of mental health professionals surveyed (84%) agreed that contact with social service providers re-traumatizes rape victims.

a) Eighty-one percent of study participants believed that the legal system's treatment of rape victims is psychologically detrimental.

b) Eighty-nine percent of study participants agreed that the medical, post-rape exam was traumatizing for rape survivors.

c) Fifty-eight percent of study participants implicated mental health professionals in contributing to secondary victimization of rape survivors through harmful practices.

So do I have an issue with therapist?No not if they are recovered from their own issues and in that completely mentally able to help someone else with theirs. I refuse to believe that you are so damaged that you will never completely recover because I have witnessed first hand on many occasions in my own self the transformation an alter can acheive through healing.Going from a defeated,self loathing,shame ridden,negative part to a completely helpful nuturing part of my system when they have healed. I also believe if you choose to deny these parts although you fell like you have healed enough they will make themselves known in other harmful ways.Like the doctor in my first excerpt explains.

I just said this somewhere, and I can't find it. But this will be my only refrain concerning this subject:

Just remember, we all heal individually and differently. This goes for those of us on the inside as well as on the outside.

for me, I know it's important to be truly honest with ourselves about what has been done to us, and what the outcome will likely be. To recognize that my 'fairy-tale' life that I thought was going to be mine will not happen, is a necessary reality. To know that there are aspects of the effects from abuse that might never go away completely are important for me to come to terms with. On the other hand, pursuing healing as far as it can be pursued is also very important to me. I tend to go all one way or the other; thinking, "this is impossible. I should just quit", or "this is going to be just like nothing ever happened, but better". Both streams of thought are a little skewed. A good sense of reality within a safe envioronment is a benefit to the whole process.
Pat

love the poste