Multiple Personalities Support Group
Dissociative identity disorder is a diagnosis described as the existence in an individual of two or more distinct identities or personalities, each with its own pattern of perceiving and interacting with the environment. At least two of these personalities are considered to routinely take control of the individual's behavior, and there is also some associated memory loss,...
I realize that I will process the trauma on each individual personality with their own PTSD and their own self harm. I was trying to figure out why I want to cut again. It's because two of my personalities have been having flash backs of their own. They have not processed their issues to overcome their poor coping skills yet, so they do not know how to cope. I was beginning to think I'm an idiot for not being able to control my desire to cut, but I just realized that all of us have not learned how to. While some of us are walking healthy, because they processed their stuff, the others haven't yet. I was also thinking that I could control who comes out and when, thinking that I could call upon others for help, but if that personality does not want to come out I cannot make her. Nor can she interact with the personalities that are lost in their own stuff. I'm not making excuses to cut, I'm actually understanding why my brain operates the way it does which usually makes me feel so ashamed of my inability to do the right things. What a scrambled brain!
I think the challenge is getting the alter who is so angry and wants to self harm to process constructively emotions.
The "How" of getting to a place where the anger is reduced and the need to self harm no longer necessary is something I wish we would discuss more in here.
when i get to wanting to self injure myself... i feel numb and it is a scarey numb... and i need to feel... it could perhaps come from shutting my feelings off from the abuse... i am not sure, but kinda makes some sense to me...
i thank you for the post... it is food for thought for me... pls don't feel like an idiot... i think that where i come from with the abuse at the ages that it happened... that it is normal and is a sign that there is more room for work on certain areas that are coming to life and like Stephanie said ' the personality is wanting and needing to be explored... and like john said... the challenge of getting the alter that is so angry to be able to constructively express itself... like we have with our other alters... i am just learning here and know that there probably is more and more for me to deal with....