yes, I experience arguments and what I call 'committee meetings'. It's usually when I'm trying to work something out, trying to understand, get a handle on something, figure it out. I look at it from a few perspectives. A lot of times I learn and grow from it and make progress. Sometimes I paralyze myself in indecision. Do you have a host that can mediate?

When I was working I found it a valuable resource. Now that I'm not working, sometimes I welcome the company, but when I want to relax it can be annoying. I'm not feeling as keyed up right now. Having the dog cuddling up to me and petting her has allowed me to calm down.

yay.. you got your mind on something else. I was going to say music or something.. a nice cuddly, breathing best friend is even better. :)

found a great meditation tape visualizing breath in white healing energy exhale black smoke toxic energy out works for me

I do have a few, I just have to remember to use them. I did use one of my own where I'm sitting in a mountain meadow surrounded by wild flowers. It's a comfortably warm day with a cool breeze. I'm high up looking at the peaceful valley below.

oo loum, that reminds me of the song I just posted.. Up Where We Belong :)

I believe in Love.. God is Love

i like that journ

It was my birthday today. I had planned to take the day off, but ended up working on a backyard project. relaxing is difficult.

relaxing is hard for me also...i dont know how to give myself permission to breath and stay quiet and still in the present moment....indeed, i have to learn how...to be human and live in the present.

When I was first working on the 3rd of the 12 Steps was the first time in my life I ever relaxed, and it felt sooo weird. I only did it for one second. Mostly I feel like either some crisis is happening, or I'm waiting for the other shoe to fall.

I can do it if I just make an effort to trust God and put it all in His hands. lol Which I couldn't do that first time I was doing the 3rd Step. It's been gradual that when I do that, God does a pretty good job, and I have grown in my trust only for God, no person and no thing, not even my selves.

Learning how to be human, yes, and not think we are obligated to be somebody else's introject.

Happy Late bday Steph wishing you are year of health and healing bmw

thanks bmw...on the relaxing note, my therapist says after vacation we are going to start working toward being able to have fun without panic. Maybe we'll learn something useful enough to share. Hopeful.

I hope so too, Stephanie. I could use some lessons in that too.