Multiple Personalities Support Group
Dissociative identity disorder is a diagnosis described as the existence in an individual of two or more distinct identities or personalities, each with its own pattern of perceiving and interacting with the environment. At least two of these personalities are considered to routinely take control of the individual's behavior, and there is also some associated memory loss,...
My parents are going to be visiting me soon. As much as I love them and miss them I am having a really hard time dealing with that becasue of a couple of things.
I am physically really not up for much and they don't really understand that, and if I overdo it I crash for weeks. This could cause a bunch of problems, not the least of which is that it could prevent me from seeing my therapist. (even if I do not crash, just trying to plan having them here and seeing her will be nearly impossible time and energy wise) I am currently seeing her three times a week and even that doesn't feel like enough because the DID diagnosis is still pretty new.... and old PTSD issues and cutting and eating disorder stuff have all come back. My parents don't' know about any of this except the physical stuff and they are not at all understanding re mental health stuff so telling them, esp while I am still trying to learn how to deal with all this is not an option.
I have been told that parts will only come out when they feel safe, but that does not seem to be entirely true of my parts. Since we are still working out parameters as to who can be out when and stuff like that, and since they have a hard time with emotions and can get sort of out of control, I am really worried about how to handle them when my parents are here.
Plus, even though the abuse and rapes and stuff I went thru were not in any way my parents' fault, the way that things were handled and just some of the dynamics in our relationship in general are triggering to me when I am doing well.....and rt now I am far from doing well.
I already put off having them visit a few months ago and there is no way to ask them not to come now, and I do want to see them. And, I don't want to hurt them.
So, I am just pretty much freaking out rt now, and I am honestly not sure what I need to get from posting about this, but any support, suggestions, etc would be appreciated. And I am wondering if others family members know about their DID or not, and if not how do you handle that?
I am physically really not up for much and they don't really understand that, and if I overdo it I crash for weeks. This could cause a bunch of problems, not the least of which is that it could prevent me from seeing my therapist. (even if I do not crash, just trying to plan having them here and seeing her will be nearly impossible time and energy wise) I am currently seeing her three times a week and even that doesn't feel like enough because the DID diagnosis is still pretty new.... and old PTSD issues and cutting and eating disorder stuff have all come back. My parents don't' know about any of this except the physical stuff and they are not at all understanding re mental health stuff so telling them, esp while I am still trying to learn how to deal with all this is not an option.
I have been told that parts will only come out when they feel safe, but that does not seem to be entirely true of my parts. Since we are still working out parameters as to who can be out when and stuff like that, and since they have a hard time with emotions and can get sort of out of control, I am really worried about how to handle them when my parents are here.
Plus, even though the abuse and rapes and stuff I went thru were not in any way my parents' fault, the way that things were handled and just some of the dynamics in our relationship in general are triggering to me when I am doing well.....and rt now I am far from doing well.
I already put off having them visit a few months ago and there is no way to ask them not to come now, and I do want to see them. And, I don't want to hurt them.
So, I am just pretty much freaking out rt now, and I am honestly not sure what I need to get from posting about this, but any support, suggestions, etc would be appreciated. And I am wondering if others family members know about their DID or not, and if not how do you handle that?
Perhaps you could schedule phone appointments with you therapist instead of actually having to go and visit her in an office? This might be easier to excuse to your parents, you just say it's a friend who needs to talk to you about some stuff and you'll be back in a minute.
You don't mention how long they are staying for if its for a couple of days you may find it easier than you thought, if it's for longer then plan some time at the end of the day for your other parts to express themselves in healthy ways.
Also are they staying with you or at a hotel? Perhaps you could suggest that they go out on day trips and things whilst you have "doctors" appointments about physical things.
If you don't feel comfortable with lying to them then perhaps you could tell them that you take a nap every afternoon just to get some space for yourself and your parts. If your parents haven't figured out that you have DID chances are that your parts have cooperated in the past, I'm sure if you ask them they will cooperate again
xxx