Multiple Personalities Support Group
Dissociative identity disorder is a diagnosis described as the existence in an individual of two or more distinct identities or personalities, each with its own pattern of perceiving and interacting with the environment. At least two of these personalities are considered to routinely take control of the individual's behavior, and there is also some associated memory loss,...
So, I would like to know whether or not we who suffer with DID/Multiple Personalities are entertaining our alters or are we working to heal ourselves striving for integration?
My own take on it is that people are like magnets. All of their atoms (characteristics) are lined up in such a way that they function as intended (magnetic/'whole' person). When a magnet is dropped or hammered, it may lose its magnetic properties because the atoms lose their alignment. They are still the same atoms, but no longer working together as they were meant to. In DID the traumas we experienced were the dropping of the magnet, or the hammering of it, and our 'atoms'/ characteristics became mis-aligned and caused the DID. When we heal the damages done, the alignment may be restored. We will still have the same 'atoms', but they will be so aligned that we are able to be like a functional magnet/whole person.
Am I rambling? Sorry.
I hope I can explain myself clearly here. I have one alter who was created during the trauma of Satanic Ritual Abuse. She is 9 years old. Her name is Victoria.
She has been known to abuse us in the most unspeakable ways. My other Alters started to use her as their release of anger therefore her acting out was huge and deadly. There had to be a renewing of our minds inorder for us to stay alive. We had to agree on this and we came to understand that we needed to love Victoria even in her abusive anger. This blew her mind and she could not understand why everyone still loved her. (Yes, I do believe in the Lord and His merciful heart and the fact that while we were still sinners He loved us still) That's where the love came from. Everyone was persistant with their actions of love no matter how unlovable Victoria was. One night she finally surrendered to the Lord asked forgiveness to those she had harmed and calapsed in the arms of Jesus. She asked us all if they would not mind if she went to sleep for a while due to her life time of trying to control her body memories and everyone elses anger she was beyond exhaustion. To this day she is still sleeping.
It has been quite an uproar since she fell asleep because everyone had to look at their own issues and anger.
My point here is this...I believe that everyone entertained the fact that Vicyoria was responsible for all our anger and hatered. This allowed the others to not take responsibility for their own issues. Now, that she is sleeping others have come out more and are starting to work on their own traumas and anger. Just like Victoria.
I just questioned everyone because I know for myself I felt safer to keep my alters around and beactive in my life. However, it is written in the Word of God that we are to love our God with ALL our hearts, minds, and souls. When I read that it blew our minds with the realization that if everyone could come to a place like Victoria did we could all ive in hormany in the grace of God. I am well aware that we may never be completely intagrated, but we are now learning to enjoy the the positive characteristics that each one of us have and the team work becomes less disfunctional with each surrender embraced in the love for each other.
Today, I love each and every alter for being who they are and how they saved my life. I believe in unity creating one heart, mind and soul attained by the Grace of God for His purpose and in doing this nobody has to be alone in their dispair.
God Bless you ALL!