Oh, should add that the three of them seem to have their own opinions-like my little kid does not really like or trust my spouse, and won't "come out" around her.
And I guess that ATM's the biggest problem.

Im assuming you havent been officially diagnosed with DID which is totally cool because there are many out there who never get the diagnosis but see so many similarities between themselves and those who have been diagnosed they they declare themselves to have the dx.
Unfortunately its hard to find a professional who actually knows how to deal with DID in the correct way and to have them actually diagnose you can take some time because they need to see the switch for themselves between 2 distinct personalities which is sometimes difficult when the personalities are reluctant to reveal themselves to the outside world.
From what you describe though it sounds like you have co consciousness. Eg you feel their presence but you are still in control. This is sometimes this is very handy because you are in control of the situation and they still get to have some input. I would encourage you to listen to your personalities though and allow them to express their opinions. For example you say your little doesnt trust you spouse. Just remember that your little has had many opportunities to see someone who has meant to have been able to count on someone only to see that person fail your little (you) so they are reluctant to trust your spouse will be there for the long term and they your spouse will not hurt you.
Be patient with your internals and remember that no matter what their main role is to protect you. Even those internals who cause havoc are trying to protect you in their own unique way.

I did the same thing. I just started asking people with DID if my experience seems similar to theirs. One particular person said no, our experiences are different but to her I still seems like DID. So not everyone is identical. I guess this is true for bipolar or PTSD. But we share consistent similarities. Have what seems like unique personalities speak inside your head does sound like DID. I sure do. As far as the little one who doesn't trust your wife. I would spend as much time as you can talking to her, making sure she trusts you. Then you can begin to reassure her as to your wife. Your experience does sound to me too like co-consciousness. I've had the feeling of being conscious but someone else is talking and making decisions and I can't seem to stop it. This hasn't happened in a while. But co-consciousness is a good thing. Especially if the host (you) can stay in control. It gives you easy access to your alter and then to talk and relate to her. So sorry you have DID. It never comes from good experiences. I'm sorry you were in enough trauma to cause you to split. But I'm glad you are here. Hope you stay around and let us know how things proceed. Good luck with this.

Sorry I kept referring to your alter as a 'her' because mine are. Your could be either male or female. I'm guessing male though because that's your gender. Which is your alter, male or female?

I'm in the same boat. When My alts take over, I am aware of everything they do an say, as I suspect they are when I am talking. But, that doesn't mean that they aren't every bit as real.