Miscarriage Support Group

This community is dedicated to those who have experienced the traumatizing event of a miscarriage or a stillbirth. Miscarriage remains one of the most common complication of pregnancy, but that doesn't make it easy to deal with. Join the group and find support in the company of others who know what you're going through.

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zombieunicorn 12/03/2012

So, I've managed to pick myself up, and dust myself off. I was doing okay, with the m/c after we started trying again.
Well, today I went to check my mail, and got a packet from my insurance company, congratulating me on my pregnancy. It felt like I was slapped in the face by a bag of two ton bricks. Enough, to leave my knees weak. I didn't think it would effect me so, but it did. It's weird, because for all I know, I could be pregnant now. It is too early to test. Sometimes I think I may have a symptom or two, but chalk it off as wishful thinking. But then again, if I am, I'm afraid I will be a wreck. This has been slightly traumatizing... Oh, the insurance company wants me to call them, but Idk if I can. And tell them what? Thanks for congratulating for nothing...
Sometimes I feel like I'm screaming in a crowd full of people, but nobody hears me. I just want so bad to.do this mommy thing, but it feels like my life has been an ongoing series of misfortunate events.
Anywho, sorry about the long vent.

deleted_user 12/03/2012

Hugs to you!

When I found out I was pregnant, I went out and registered at all these baby stores online. And then of course, I lost the baby, and a representative from one of the stores called and left a congratulations voice mail.

I totally get how you are feeling. I felt like someone had punched me and I had to sit down for a minute to cry.

deleted_user 12/04/2012

My insurance company called me while I was in the middle of my mc and I just lost it on them

deleted_user 12/04/2012

When I was pregnant the second time, I told one of my co-workers that I was pregnant. I had asked her to keep it quiet, but she didn't and blabbed to a whole bunch of our customers. Of course she didn't tell them when I lost the baby... Then, up to a year later, I would just be asked randomly by customers how my baby was doing. It was devastating!

zombieunicorn 12/04/2012

Thanks, ladies. Sucks that I'm not alone, but at the same time it is comforting. Even though I'm doing a lot better, it still hurts pretty bad. I told my fiance last night about the papers, then I started crying again, and all he told me was that I can't let it get to me. I know he meant well, but damn. How could I not let it get to me. I had brought it up to my mom, and she listened for a minute, but then started lecturing me about him and I finding a place... I just wanted someone to listen. But if I talk, I feel like I'm crazy, or over reacting.

deleted_user 12/05/2012

I completely understand how you feel (in your last comment) about talking to other people who mean well or tell you things you don't want to hear. I think it's important to find someone who is willing to listen. For me, that was my cousin. She had never gone through a MC but she was there through both of mine and saw the pain I went through. My boyfriend was there also but guys just don't have the same kind of understanding that women do. I actually started opening up to a lot of ppl about it after my 2nd miscarriage. I talked about it all the time and cried but it was good for me. It was what I needed. With my cousin, I held nothing in. I told her about the negative feelings that I felt towards both of my sisters who had gotten pregnant after each of my miscarriages, about my coworker who had gotten pregnant, aborted, got pregnant again and kept it ..... it was such a hard time but talking about my TRUE feelings to someone who was willing to listen helped me a lot. It's finding that person that is the challenge or building up the strength to just talk about it when you need to.

deleted_user 12/12/2012

I'm so sorry to hear that this happened to you. I have lost 4 babies and this sort of thing has happened to me many times. With the first one, my husband told his best friend when we were pregnant but because of the miles between us, the news of the miscarriage never made it to him. A month later we got a Christmas card from him addressed to my husband and I and our "future little guy." It was devastating. I would constantly get paper mail that tracked what would have been the growth of our angels. I got tons of baby magazines and fliers in the mail. One time I even got a can of formula from a baby company about 6 months after my 4th miscarriage. It is outrageous that this happens but you're not alone and your feelings are completely normal. I wish companies understood this sort of thing and took steps to prevent this from happening to more women like us.

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