I didn't think I could get pregnant, so was surprised (and thrilled) when I found out I was at 43. The staff at my doc's office referred to me as "the older lady." Loved that, but didn't care because I felt my wealth of life experiences would make me a better mom. I had always said that experiencing birth and parenthood were not important to me. Well, not until this happened anyway... I found out I was pregnant at approximately 8 weeks and miscarried at 13. The loss of the hopes and dreams that were created in that short period of time is devastating. I don't know that anyone other than my partner & others that have lived through it understand the depths of this pain. I purposely took this past week off work, as I should have delivered on 06/23/07, and I knew this would be a difficult time. Not only grieving the loss of my baby, but the fact that I will probably never be a parent by birth. My clock wasn't ticking before, but it's doing double-time now and I feel like I'm watching the sand sift through the hour glass...
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A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??