Miscarriage Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have experienced the traumatizing event of a miscarriage or a stillbirth. Miscarriage remains one of the most common complication of pregnancy, but that doesn't make it easy to deal with. Join the group and find support in the company of others who know what you're going through.
As many of you ladies may know my DH and I lost our 1st baby in Nov '09. For a variety of reason the greif and true feelings of my loss did not really hit me until Jan '10. At this time I was in a very bad place. I lost my job and my health insurance, and was feeling very low and depressed.
Because at the time I had no isurance I looked into getting some counseling through some nonprofits. I wasn't too successful, but did fid a group that provided 3 phone counseling sessions for free for parents who had experienced a pregnancy loss. I went through the 3 sessions and was told that there were some in person groups available, but that they were about 45 minutes away and that there was a waiting list. At the time I was still feeling pretty badly, and was upset at the thought of not having my phone counselor to speak with. I agreed to be put on the waiting list and was told that I could always say no.
The group just emailed me and said that they have an opening for new members next month. The sessions are in the evenings and like I said earlier about 45 minutes away from us by train. Originally my DH said that he would go with me because he knew it was important to me etc. I approached him today about the possibility of going and he was much more resistant. He doesn't want to travel, the sessions are too far away and too long etc. He did say that if I wanted him to go he would, but that he really would prefer not to. I myself am also at an impasse. I feel as though I am in a different place than I was when I 1st sought out the group, but am very fearful that I am avoiding talking further about my loss by not going to the group.
I guess my question is would you go to a support group alone? and Have you ever felt like you are avoiding feelings about your mc?
thanks for reading my really long post! I feel very alone in this decision as DH seems to have already have checked out.
Because at the time I had no isurance I looked into getting some counseling through some nonprofits. I wasn't too successful, but did fid a group that provided 3 phone counseling sessions for free for parents who had experienced a pregnancy loss. I went through the 3 sessions and was told that there were some in person groups available, but that they were about 45 minutes away and that there was a waiting list. At the time I was still feeling pretty badly, and was upset at the thought of not having my phone counselor to speak with. I agreed to be put on the waiting list and was told that I could always say no.
The group just emailed me and said that they have an opening for new members next month. The sessions are in the evenings and like I said earlier about 45 minutes away from us by train. Originally my DH said that he would go with me because he knew it was important to me etc. I approached him today about the possibility of going and he was much more resistant. He doesn't want to travel, the sessions are too far away and too long etc. He did say that if I wanted him to go he would, but that he really would prefer not to. I myself am also at an impasse. I feel as though I am in a different place than I was when I 1st sought out the group, but am very fearful that I am avoiding talking further about my loss by not going to the group.
I guess my question is would you go to a support group alone? and Have you ever felt like you are avoiding feelings about your mc?
thanks for reading my really long post! I feel very alone in this decision as DH seems to have already have checked out.
I'm sorry for your loss. It is so hard to move through this kind of sadness. I am a proponent of therapy for sure -- it has helped me a lot in my life -- but I am also someone who will avoid it at all costs even though I know it's good for me. If that makes sense. My miscarriage was 3 weeks ago, and I knew I needed counseling but I put it off. I have an appointment next week, but I already dread going, and it's only 5 minutes from my house.
So my answer to you is that, yes, I think it would help you. I know it would help you. But I completely understand your not wanting to travel 45 minutes alone. I guess that's not really an answer. I'm just comiserating with you.
If you can't go to the group, at least post here and other places. The support is so helpful and important. Men and women process things so differently, don't they? We need to talk, even if we don't want to.
Hugs!
BTW, try and maybe get a friend or family member or SOMEONE to go with you if you do go. Be safer and possibly more comfortable for you that way.
I agree with SMWgal. Try out the first session and take a friend or family member if DH just seems too resistant to go. You don't want to force him into it. You may find it to be a really helpful, supportive place or something not worth the 45 min drive. At least you'll know.
If you do attend, let us know how it went.
In the mean time, keep posting here and using us for support. We'll be thinking of you.