You are definitely not alone. When I had my first miscarriage, I was with someone I wasn't entirely happy with. I was willing to stay involved with him so the baby would have its mom AND its dad, but at the same time I was skeptical. My unhappiness would greatly affect the child's growth. I feel like the miscarriage saved me... But, still, I wanted my baby more than anything.

You should not be guilty. The losses weren't your fault. There was something abnormal going on with the chromosomes. (I've done so much bio research.) It's all chance... It has nothing to do with you, or the father's health. There's nothing anyone could have done.

Still, I know how you feel. Even being the logical woman I am, I have my moments where I break down and blame myself. I think it happens to us all.

Cherish your baby and be well.

Thank you so much Empress. This made me feel better. Like you I was willing to stay with the first guy for the babies sake but I think all the stress and my unhappiness is what cause me to lose both babies. Our relationship was not a healthy one we would fight constantly and I realized with baby #2 that I was going to leave him whether I had the baby or not because staying with someone because of a baby is not a good reason. A child can sense when you are unhappy and I wouldn't want them to grow up in an unhappy environment. So in a way I feel relieve (but it feels awful to think let alone say that) .... I do feel reasonable especially with baby #2 because I knew we were bad for each other yet I stayed and had unprotected sex so that is why I really blame myself for that one ... Again thank you so much your words did help

Whitbit, Congradulations on your new baby, thats so uplifting to hear that people who have mc's, still can have healthy babies.

I too was the same. I was in a very mentally abusive marriage, but tried to have a baby, but 4 mc's later, I gave up. I finally, after 27 yrs of sucking the life out of me, I left him last year. I met a new wonderfully perfect man & although he has a son, it is not his biological son. He met his first wife when he was 18 months old, so he raised him until now (he's 23 now with a 1 yr old). So I knew he wanted a baby of his own, so I hoped & convinced myself that the problem wasn't me, it had to be my ex. So in April, we decided to try & see. But at 6 1/2 weeks, once again, # 5 mc.

That was so dissapointing, because now I know its me, & not my ex. Plus, my new bf had to be exposed to this loss, that he's never had to experience. I still feel like sh#@t for exposing him to that, but he says he prepared himself for a loss. But I could tell he was sooooo excited to be a dad to one he knew was his very own.

He doesn't know it yet, but we're going to give it 1 more try (in a couple of weeks when my cycle is over). The Dr wants to try me on Progestrone, so this is my last hope.

I'm so jealous that you have your precious ange, but in a good way, lol

I hope you 7 your family have a wonderful life & stop blaming yourself for the 1st 2!