Miscarriage Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have experienced the traumatizing event of a miscarriage or a stillbirth. Miscarriage remains one of the most common complication of pregnancy, but that doesn't make it easy to deal with. Join the group and find support in the company of others who know what you're going through.
Hello ALL,
I haven't been on here for 2 years at least and I apologize for not being here and being a support person for you all who are going through this terrible experience.
I learned last Monday that I'm having another miscarriage. My first miscarriage was so early we never even got to our first prenatal appt, because I found out one day I was pregnant and 3 days later that it was not viable.
This time not only did we see the babies heartbeat but I got to hear it 3 days prior to them NOT finding it last Monday. And I was 7 wks 3 days, not sure when the heartbeat stopped from 6 wks 6 days till then, but it had and I am completely devestated.
I chose to let the baby pass on it's own since it's so early that I thought that would be the easiest option instead of having that pill that makes your uterus contract (scared me because I have to work and was worried I'd be in a lot of pain while working) and then I decided not to have the D&C just yet. I go back next Friday and if the baby hasn't passed by then I will in fact have to have the D&C. I'm worried though because I haven't had any signs of the miscarriage starting - no cramps or spotting nothing! So I'm scared that I may have to end up having a D&C after all of this.
I can't move on either - I know it's just been a week since I found out - but I'm completely numb and devestated. I don't want to be around people AT ALL! Work is fine, cause I just keep busy and don't bother with anything but work...but I'm easily irritated and frustrated and people can tell something isn't right with me. I took 3 days off when I first found out, but it didn't do much good. My husband was barely around and I only got to see him for about 2 hours a day after that so that was hard to not be with him more.
I have 2 step kids who live with us, they are 14 and 11 and are at a hard stage right now with their attitudes and being lazy and messy - and I'm just so not in the mood to deal with them or anyone...and I don't think my husband or anyone really understand I just want to come home and go straight to my room and not be bothered. Is that bad? I just feel so bugged by every little thing.
HELPPP...I'm going to see a thearapist but not till May 2nd and right now I'm just at a loss on how to deal with this and move on or at least begin to live again.
I haven't been on here for 2 years at least and I apologize for not being here and being a support person for you all who are going through this terrible experience.
I learned last Monday that I'm having another miscarriage. My first miscarriage was so early we never even got to our first prenatal appt, because I found out one day I was pregnant and 3 days later that it was not viable.
This time not only did we see the babies heartbeat but I got to hear it 3 days prior to them NOT finding it last Monday. And I was 7 wks 3 days, not sure when the heartbeat stopped from 6 wks 6 days till then, but it had and I am completely devestated.
I chose to let the baby pass on it's own since it's so early that I thought that would be the easiest option instead of having that pill that makes your uterus contract (scared me because I have to work and was worried I'd be in a lot of pain while working) and then I decided not to have the D&C just yet. I go back next Friday and if the baby hasn't passed by then I will in fact have to have the D&C. I'm worried though because I haven't had any signs of the miscarriage starting - no cramps or spotting nothing! So I'm scared that I may have to end up having a D&C after all of this.
I can't move on either - I know it's just been a week since I found out - but I'm completely numb and devestated. I don't want to be around people AT ALL! Work is fine, cause I just keep busy and don't bother with anything but work...but I'm easily irritated and frustrated and people can tell something isn't right with me. I took 3 days off when I first found out, but it didn't do much good. My husband was barely around and I only got to see him for about 2 hours a day after that so that was hard to not be with him more.
I have 2 step kids who live with us, they are 14 and 11 and are at a hard stage right now with their attitudes and being lazy and messy - and I'm just so not in the mood to deal with them or anyone...and I don't think my husband or anyone really understand I just want to come home and go straight to my room and not be bothered. Is that bad? I just feel so bugged by every little thing.
HELPPP...I'm going to see a thearapist but not till May 2nd and right now I'm just at a loss on how to deal with this and move on or at least begin to live again.
I'm mad that we got to see and hear the heartbeat and then 3 days later it's taken away from us. I just can't seem to wrap my head around that fact at all!
I know you both understand what I'm going thru - and that's why I look here for some kind of way to help me thru this.
Beth - I'm sorry your currently going thru this to, it's an awful thing to have to deal with period. My prayers are with you tomorrow during your procedure and there after to heal from this awful pain.
Right now - your emotional health is a sign of needing help with the passing. I know it doesn't make sense, but the body is now holding onto something which is turning toxic. I will keep the description that brief. It needs help to miscarry in order to stop having your blood pick up the stuff, trying to flush it through your bladder and digestive tract.
Aside from your body sending such clear signals for help, I understand the other part of your emotional load includes the grieving process. I understand and know you need to deal with it. Just right now, it is being clouded by how your body is screaming for aid.
Definitely insist on getting grieving therapy and have your husband included if you can. I hope through this, you can get some ideas how to handle the preteen and teenager while making yourself some quiet time.
I understand how easy it is to just come home and lock yourself in your room to get a break from the huge exhaustion of being out in the real world each day after learning of your loss. It is normal.
Just for right now, get your health taken care of and be gentle to yourself. After the DnC, eat chocolate and jello to help with the healing. Pick up a stuff bear/bunny or something to hold on to while sleeping. I know it sounds silly, but it does work. Again, bunch of hugs for you.