unfortunately i have gone through this and have a balanced chromosome translocation. i have had 3 loses now- however knew that i had this prior to trying. i have a 40% chance of having a healthy baby with either a balanced or normal chromosome arrangement.

you may want to talk with your ob about having a genetics screen done on yourself and your partner. it is just a blood test.

i am so sorry for your losses and totally understand. my last one was on nov. 21st and i was 14 wks- and also a boy. it is so hard still but i refuse to give up and will keep trying.

hang in there.

I am sorry for you loss. I had my D&C three weeks ago tomorrow and I saw my doctor this week. I was ten weeks along. Sounds like you need a new doctor if yours is dismissive of your concerns. My doctor asked if I had questions and answered them all.

I had two losses in a row and my doctor was the same way. Don't get me wrong, i love my doctor but after the first loss, she was like, lightening can't strike twice, well it did. Then when I got pregnant the second time and lost that one, she said, it couldn't happen again. Well, with this pregnancy, I lost one of the two I was carrying. I have had all the testing done done that you can imagine on me and the babies... It is just hard telling why it happens to some and not others. Hang in there.

I have had 3 miscarraiges.One last year, One 6 months ago and one 2 days ago. With the first I didn't have tissue analysis but with the one 6 months ago I did. The doctor said it was chromosomal.I also found out it was a girl which was very emotional for DH and I. The results on the most recent m/c aren't back yet but from what my doctor explained to me a chromosomal problem is what he said most m/c are and it's a fluke of nature. My doctor did do genetic testing on me and everything came back fine. So why 3 miscarriages? He says sometimes it just happens and some people can have multiple whithout it being something wrong with them. Who knows? I don't get why some people have multiple and them some people have none.

I have had several m/c, but none were due to known chromosomal abnormalities. I was told after each of the last 2 that the cause with the least chance of recurring is a chromosomal abnormality... so I would think it does bode well for any future pregnancies. However, you might look into seeing a genetic counselor for some reassurance.

Hello, I am so sorry for the loss of your little boy. I also had a m/c at 12 week with D&C last week and am waiting for the results of the genetic testing. I am really nervous to hear about the sex and any problems (or no problems-I feel I will be more angry if I find there were no problems and it could've been prevented- I feel like my doctor was dismissive as well) It helps being on this site and reading about others experiences so thanks for sharing. I had another m/c 2 yrs ago but they did not do testing, said it was just a "fluke" so I don't know the results of that loss. Next time (God willing) I will see a high risk specialist and NOT my regular OB, this is what you should look into as well with your history. At least you'll feel confident that you've done all you can. Good luck, don't give up.

I have had 2 miscarriages in a row as well. The first I was 14.5 weeks and the baby died from an infection. The second I had bad numbers from the start and there was no hb at 6 wks. I am currently pregnant again and I am 13wks 3days and of course I am terrified because of the other two losses I suffered. The worst part was hearing the gender of my babies both of them were girls, but what made it even worse is when I heart that they were both completely healthy. I think it would have hurt less to be stabbed directly into my heart. I will pray for you, but if I were you I would not give up hope!

I'm so sorry for your loss. The first RE I went to when I had my m/c last year was not very sympathetic or compassionate. He stayed his obligatory 2 minutes and left the room after he told me. I just had another m/c about 5 weeks ago with OB doc and he was great! He actually sat down and did not act in a hurry to leave the office and gave me a hug. That was the first visit I had with him so I had no relationship with him at that point. That is really what I needed at the time as I was alone at the visit without my DH!
I would consider pushing for recurrent m/c work up. They did on me after my 1st m/c since I was 41 and didn't want to waste time. Regular OBs may not recommend until 3rd m/c but that is old school way of thinking and since you are on the brink of "advanced maternal age" (sorry bout that but I'm there with you) I think you qualify. A reproductive endocrinogist or high risk OB would probably be more willing. They need to make sure there are not other problems causing your m/c's and then can chalk up to "chromosomal abn".

Yes, I have been through this. My baby was trisomy 21. You should ask if you can have genetic counseling so that you can understand what this means to you. Have you and your husband had genetic testing (genetic karyotype)?

Trisomy 21 is Down's syndrome and there are several ways a baby gets Down's. Sometimes it's a balanced translocation, like elingke wrote about. That can be inherited. The most common reason for Down's, however, is not inherited from the parents. It's just a random event. At 35 you have a 1 in 287 chance of that happening. I have had two doctors now tell me that since my husband and my tests came back as normal (no translocations, etc.), we have no more chance of this happening than before. It was just bad luck.

I don't know much about trisomy 22 except that it is a frequent cause for miscarriages. It can be inherited, though. If you've had testing and are normal, maybe your doctor was dismissive because you don't have a translocation and are not at any higher risk of it happening again.

But here are my suggestions:
1) Request genetic counseling
2) If you haven't had genetic testing, ask your doctor to order that for you and your husband will have to go through his doctor. It is expensive, but my insurance covered it since my doctor ordered it.
3) Start looking for a new doctor. I got a new doctor after my miscarriage just because I felt my other doctor didn't listen to me when I felt things weren't right (and I ended up being right and having to have a second D&C). So ask friends for recommendations and change doctors.

Thank you all for your responses. This has been such a hard time, and talking to others who have been in similar situations has been so helpful.

Sorry I'm a little late to this discussion, and most of all, I'm so sorry for your loss. The follow-up appointments often bring up acute grief. I wish there was some way around it but trust me (after 3 losses in a year), it is better to have the information. It can help you make decisions about your care in the future.

I agree with those ladies who suggested further testing, in particular genetic testing. If your and your partner's karotypes come back normal, you know the error was random. Sometimes genetic errors are random but if you and/or your partner are carriers, your chances of problems are higher. Since this is your second consecutive loss, I would also push for a full miscarriage work-up by a specialist. One RE I saw told me the latest research says the results are the same whether patients are tested after 2 losses or wait until after 3. It could save you future heartache. Another reason to see a specialist is because people like you and me are more likely to receive treatment for this problem sooner.

Lastly, your doctor's dismissive manner. If you aren't receiving the care and time and explanations you need, please consider another doctor. There are kind, compassionate providers out there. I'm lucky enough to have several. They ease the pain by validating it and doing all they can medically.

Of course these are just my thoughts. Do what is best for you. I wish you comfort and peace as you heal from your loss. Take care!

I can see you've had alot of responses. I will add my info too. I have 3 m/c in a row all within the last year. the first was at 8 weeks--no testing was done. The 2nd was around 12 weeks and my Dr. did send it to be tested. It was a boy--with trisomy 9--apparently that is very rare. My husband and I did see a genetic counselor to go over the statistics of reoccurence-went over other factors too. I found the counseling very helpful. When my Dr. went over the characteristics of a baby with trisomy 9, I told him he could stop--I had heard enough. This may sound terrible, and I hope this doesn't sound cold, but all of that information made it a little easier to accept for me. My 3rd m/c was sent for testing and came back a normal female karyotpype (sp?), that was not so easy to accept. I guess what I am trying to say is that the genetic counseling was helpful in terms of understanding exactly what happend, the factors that may have contributed to, and options if we were to get pregnant again. They reccommended I have CVS testing my next pregnancy--unfortunatly I didn't get that far along. Things do get better-with time. I know there really isn't anything anyone can say to take the pain away, just know that you're not alone.