Military Families Support Group
Today's military family faces a lifestyle that is comprised of frequent deployments, which results in increased family separations. This often proves to be a stressful challenge for military families. This community is dedicated to the families that are dealing with the unique challenges of distance and military-related stress.
My brother in law is being deployed in January to Afganistan.He lives in Alabama and we live in Tennessee and we are trying to get him home for the holidays to be with his 2 little girls whom he hasn't seen in over 2 years because my sister,the mother,wouldn't allow it.We were told by her that he just didn't want to see them.Now she has practically abandoned them because she is on drugs real bad.She hasn't seen them in over a month.She just up and left them with my mother and refuses to come home to them.These children really need at least one of their parents with them for the holidays but no one has the money to get him home.He has threatened to start hitch hiking so he can get home to them.I am scared to death if he does that that something will happen to him.
He was working until he had to go for a month of training in October.When he came back the company he worked for was gone,they hadn't just moved they had closed down for good.Now he has no money to even pay his bills,he hasn't even been paid yet for his training.His truck was even repoed while he was gone.The payments were being taken out of his paychecks but the place where he got it never got them.The guy is having a real hard time and I don't have any idea how to even help him come home.He is total shock that the mother of his children,whom he trusted to take care of them has abandoned them and he now feels like he has too.
So if any one knows of any way to help him at least get home to see his girls it would be a big help.
He was working until he had to go for a month of training in October.When he came back the company he worked for was gone,they hadn't just moved they had closed down for good.Now he has no money to even pay his bills,he hasn't even been paid yet for his training.His truck was even repoed while he was gone.The payments were being taken out of his paychecks but the place where he got it never got them.The guy is having a real hard time and I don't have any idea how to even help him come home.He is total shock that the mother of his children,whom he trusted to take care of them has abandoned them and he now feels like he has too.
So if any one knows of any way to help him at least get home to see his girls it would be a big help.
Atomsmasher:I don't know what your problem is with me but I came here to get info on how to help my brother in law get home so my neices would be happy for awhile,for what could very possibly be the last time they see their father.Not to be treated as if I am only here to harrass someone.But don't worry I won't bother you again.I thought this board was for families and friends of military personal to get info and support when they need it,but I guess I was mistaken where you are concerned.I didn't realize that my asking for help was such a crime.
I have an extremely hard time believing that he has so much trouble getting help for his kids, time to see them, etc etc.. I also know that many people make up bullshit stories to get attention and money, and this is a borderline story you got here.
Furthermore, I am the first person to help someone who is truly in need of assistance. I'm all about helping someone who truly needs it, and has tried to do as much as possible to help themselves. I can't help anyone who can't or won't help themselves.
Alabama is not that far from Tennessee. I'm a father, who at one time spent every other weekend driving nearly 500 miles to make sure my son was doing ok in another state with his mom. He lives with me now. My point is I don't hear any effort on his part to lift those kids out of a situation like that.
I also know that in extreme hardship conditions, like abandonment of your kids, the military will bend over backwards to help you get your life straight.
Why has he had no money from training? A visit to the disbursement office can fix that, happened to me in the military, got straightened out right away. It also takes several months to get a truck repossessed. Are you telling me he didn't receive a bill for his truck payment for that long? He had to have known something was wrong with his pay, allotment, and he had plenty of time to fix that. There is NO way it takes that long to get your pay fixed.
I see it like this, either you, or he is telling a a very tall tale. If it's you, then you are trying to get attention, or money from people with sympathy. If it's him, then he has been squandering his money, and making excuses, which you believed to be true, or he is a complete moron. I suppose that is possible, because when I was in the military, there were plenty of losers around.
Apparently you've got everything fixed now? He is also coming home from Dec 20th to Jan 2nd? That's fishy too, because that would NOT happen in the military I was in. You can take leave if you have it either for Christmas or for New years, but not both, because that would affect readiness. Every command must have enough personnel to deploy in an instant if needed, and so they must NEVER allow too many people to be on leave at one time. I just keep seeing too many inconsistencies in your posts, and I'm having a very hard time believing it.
You know what, I hope I'm wrong, and this guy just has thee worst luck, and just aint smart enough to help himself. However, I don't think I'm wrong, and I still smell a rat. That is the problem I have with you and your post.
I'm all about help and support, for what truly constitutes a need. Your story doesn't make sense, it has no details, and is typical of something made up for nefarious reasons. I'm calling bullshit on this post. Attack me if you want to, but you had better back it up with some detail, or else everyone will know what I'm saying is true.
If its true, then give us the complete unadulterated truth, along with details and timelines, and more about what he has done in an effort to help himself. If you can't do that, then stay off this board, and leave it for people who really need support and assistance.
We as a support group have to SUPPORT each other, embellished or not. A lot of people on here are family members and wives, and mr atombasher, if you have never been married or around military wives, there is A LOT of that. You just weed it out and try to help. Sometimes, someone needs to just listen. Before we post anything on here, we "promise to be nice", and what you said, no matter how true it is, wasn't. We don't know the entire situation. All we know is that someone came here for an encouraging word. The military network is a harsh place to be a lot of the time, and if there is no safe place to vent or cry out, then the situation can get worse very quickly. I know that there are a lot of times I feel completely alone and I have no idea where to turn since I am somewhere I hate and have no support system. This is supposed to be a SAFE place to go, not another place to be berated.
Calling a loved one of someone else an "idiot moron" and a "complete loser" is unneccessary and it just makes you look petty. Please, at least for my sake, if you are going to answer another post, be nice. I might want to vent one day and if I have to read something like that, it could send me over the edge on a particularly bad day.
Mamax4, I'm glad it got all sorted out for you. I hope you have a fantastic holiday with the kids and their dad, it will mean a lot to him before he deploys. Maybe when he comes back, his money situation will improve as there is a stockpile of it because of deployment. I hope he gets a good Power of Attorney while he is gone!!