Military Families Support Group

Today's military family faces a lifestyle that is comprised of frequent deployments, which results in increased family separations. This often proves to be a stressful challenge for military families. This community is dedicated to the families that are dealing with the unique challenges of distance and military-related stress.

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First time PCS'ing

AmyM23
AmyM23
My husband and I have been married for almost 5 years and we are PCS'ing to Pensacola, FL in April. I have never moved away from my family before and it's pretty scary but I am also excited to experience new things with him. We met when he was a recruiter here in my home state of CO and right after we married he did a hardship tour in Korea for a year. After that we got lucky and he was stationed back here in CO for another three years and deployed for 6 months this past February. He has been home for three months now and we have talked a lot about the upcoming move. I have made peace with the fact we have to rent out our home and that I am leaving my comfort zone, but I am experiencing something else that is really unexpected and surprising. My mom has been giving me guilt trips about moving. She cries about how my middle sister sister is not as accessible and doesn't talk to her like I do and that if she knew all her kids were going to move away she would have sold her house instead of staying there, among other things.She knew this would happen eventually and my youngest sister is stationed out of state with the USAF so it's nothing new. I don't know why she is doing this to me. I am nervous enough as it is and her acting this way makes things much more difficult. I love her and I know she is just sad we are leaving but it's hard to deal with! Has anyone ever had this problem with family before?
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am sorry to hear about how difficult your mother is making this, as if it isn't hard enough. I am VERY close with my mother also and I was really surprised how okay she has been with everything. I didn't even allow her to make me feel guilty. We talk everyday twice a day and it has been that way for two years now. Good luck.
deleted_user
deleted_user
We have moved many times in the last 10 years but my Mom has had problems with every move. She loves me but that does not make it any easier for me. Try talking to your mom. She may not realize she is stressing you out this much. My Mom has no clue when she is overstepping.

BTW : We were stationed at Eglin AFB at Destin Florida and I loved every minute of it. I would go back to that area in a heart beat.

Good luck on your upcoming move.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Oh boy...I feel you, honey. I have moved 6x in 12 years from my small, close knit family all of who still live in the same, 2 mile x 2 mile town. I STILL get the guilt trip after all these years. It will get easier on them, though.
Things now-a-days versus even 10 years ago, we have FaceTime and Skype...you don't miss a beat! Maybe purchasing a laptop ot tablet with FaceTIme on it would help ease er pain?
Moms can overstep their boundaries when it comes to this...it's hard enough for the members to pick and move their life without the added guilt-trip.
P.S. You will love Pensacola!
AmyM23
AmyM23
Thank you all so much! It has gotten better since I wrote this, and I still feel bad whenever she cries, which is more often the closer we get to our move. I am getting anxious for this to just be done. The anticipation is probably worse than the actual move will be!