This hit the nail on the head with such witty humor! I feel your pain! Sometimes all you can do is laugh. I really enjoyed your post! :D Hang in there!

Love your post. You mentioned a few symptoms I have but too but I didn't think of it being related to menopause. I have experienced a few of the 34 menopausal symptoms like 20 + last time I checked it changes daily I think . Here is a list of some:
Burning tongue, internal shakes, burning from inside out, chills, feel sunburned on arms a lot, really dry skin, vision fluctuating, boob tenderness, constipation, loss of appetite, anxiety, toe nails growing weird , sense of smell, I smell cat urine a lot , off balance feeling, dizziness, gag reflex intensified, ringing ears, ear pressure, oh and so weepy, but all that is apt to change...

Hopefully this group can help us all get through this a little easier.

Nausea, weakness, headache, back pain, crashing fatigue, no appetite, weight loss, digestive issues, pins and needles all over body, muscle pain, and tremors, to name a few! Always a new symptom, always changing! Oh, one more, severe dry eyes! Women need to catch a break!

Yessss! !

Wow, I wasn't sure if off balance and occasional dizziness was part of "the journey." I too get internal shakes. I notice it when I'm TRYING to fall asleep. Usually when I'm lying down. And here I thought it was my allergy meds. bringing that on. Guess not because I notice a lot of the girls here mentioning it too. Lately I've been dealing with anxiety and the blues... Right now I just want to recharge and stay away from anything 'stressful". I'm trying To get through this naturally....So far it hasn't been too bad. I'm 50 and last month I had my first period mishap. I had two "visits". Two weeks apart. I've been fuzzy in my thinking. As if I can't focus that well. What we're going through is NORMAL....It just doesn't feel very good!! Reading the posts from my Peri-Pals does offer insight and comfort. If ever you feel anxious about what your feeling, connect with the gals on this support group. I'll tell ya, it sure helps me. Hang Tough Girls!! Hugs to ya ALL!!!!

I get anxiety with all this too. I think it is when I focus on whatever is going on with my body at that time. I have been considering going to a therapist, just haven't done it. Seems like my mind can create scenarios and just run with it. Sure helps having others that can relate to talk to and help us through this.

ladykate - Glad we can have a bit of humor to get through this. I'm tired of it (and my friends who are done said it still took a year to get to feeling back to "normal"). My list would be something like this: I'm crampy, bloated and constipated, but still hungry (chocolate helps, but not too much); I'm retaining a ton of water, but still thirsty; I'm tired, have no energy, no motivation but have a ton to do; I just slept 8 hours, but want 8 more; my body aches, but I really should walk the dog more than 10 minutes; I have a migraine with nausea...well, I can't think of a counterpoint to this one, I just hate them. Having a drink would not mesh with the nausea... I also feel anxious and overwhelmed at times. I've become a list-freak (just don't let me lose the lists!); And, mad at my husband as he sails through life with no on-going issues like this. Ohplease let this be over soon!

Hi ctsb1902....yep, if we don't laugh about it we'll go completely mad!!! I'm with ya on all points...especially the lists!
Momma jo welcome ....the misery loves company adage is what brought us all together to get through this! Just knowing you aren't imagining things and other women are having similar experiences, helps a lot.

wow ladykate.. new top the site and noticed you have every single symptom i was having until i discovered natural progesterone cream! The cream ended my irregular and unpredictable cycles. Also helped my insomnia, personal dryness and mood swings Estrogen dominance could the reason for the stabbing stinging pain in the breast . Chemical estrogen is everywhere and leads to more problems with our symptoms or magnifies them tremendously!! Superbiotin helps my thinning hair, skin and brittle nails. Hope this helps!! Great to see you have some humor in all of this!! Thank you for your comments you have posted. you are a true help to those who feel helpless!

Debbie mentioned pins and needles sensation, wow, I feel this and I've never related them to menopause. I thought it was a neurological issue and freak me out every time I feel it. Thanks Debbie, reading this helps me with my anxiety.

yup that was a good summary, plus we all could add more and more crazy symptoms
* if I could just remember.......
* what is biting me, nothing there, feels like bugs biting
* having symptoms like a period is about to start (headaches, body aches)
* period surprise just a few days before christmas, how what joy it is....

Hopefully one day it will be somewhat normal again, I just hope we all make it thru this. As for myself I am not gonna panic any more over all this crazy crap, had the heart palpitations two years ago, guess I am alright since I am still here.
You all take a breath and try to relax, and remember you are not alone with this crap.
Peace and Love

Wow!! All these symptoms! In my late 40's, went thru erratic periods and hot flashes. Everything stopped at 50. No period. No problems til last year. Getting cramps then gone for months. 57 now. Cramps again for most of the month. Gone for last couple of days. Started looking at female cancers. Plus I suffer from lymphedema. Not fun at all!!

i am so happy I found this group! I've been reluctant to join a group because I tend to get really anxious when people describe their symptoms or suggest the diagnosis was wrong. Anyway I burst into tears reading people's posts. I am not alone after all!! I am young for perimenopause. Only 41 and none of my friends are going through it. 18 months ago my life got flipped upside down by all of the crazy symptoms. It all actually started before 18 months but I had no idea. I was just full of rage for that time and the all the physical stuff kicked in. Anyway thank you for starting this thread. I'm not going crazy!!! Here's my list...
Vertigo. Yay carnival rides
Cold all the time. It's ok I've always lived winter.
Trembling bones like my skeleton just wants to disco all night long.
Vision issues. Good thing I'm no sharpshooter.
Nausea. Stupid stupid nausea.
Emotional flatness with a smattering of weepiness and irritability just for good measure.
Muscle aches. Who needs muscles anyway?
Lack of motivation/depression. Mornings suck.
Anxiety. I'm on edge all the time waiting for the next gift from the perimenopause fairy. Or waiting for someone to tell me it's not hormones it's something worse.... So please don't tell me that! I call my doc all the time looking for reassurance. Poor woman. :-)
Itchy. Itchy itchy. ITCHY!!!
Dry mouth. Oh wait is that extra saliva? Make up your mind!
Ringing or full ears. who needs them, right?
I was blessed with migraines but thankfully my doc suggested magnesium which helped a lot. But yes someone mentioned a brain eating disease. Yup. Sometimes I'll have an episode of feeling like I'm going to lose control of my body and like I'm about to go crazy. Weird and scary. Wonder if that's what zombies feel like?
Probably the hardest for me is infertility. Been trying for 4 years to get pregnant watching all my friends pop out babies. When doc told me having a baby probably wouldn't happen I sort of shut down. I've been so focused on trying to get through each day that I haven't dealt with that sadness. At last doc visit she encouraged me to grieve and of course I burst into tears. Phew. That's a lot. But thank you all for sharing your symptoms and not judging.

I don't like the perimenopause fairy. For me it's more like the perimenopause witch!