I am sorry to hear of what recently happened with your husband and that your not feeling well and I hope things get resolved. Maybe it's your hormones out of balance and or other things going on, no one knows better than you (aside from any physical reasons) what is making you angry. Hopefully with more soul searching you can become aware of what those things are. It sounds like your angry with yourself for not feeling you are what you "used" to be? I can relate to that. We change, life changes, sometimes stressors can happen. I feel it can be a tough time for many of us women. I wish I could help more, I can only say what has helped me. I stopped beating myself up and living in the past and finally started to live in the present. To take care of myself by eating healthier and started walking, it really has helped me. I am finding the old me again! Your still there and you can get her back or rather, the new you! smiling Your going through a tough time right now, try not to be so hard on yourself. I hope you feel better and things are better when he gets back. Maybe find a nice outfit and nice dinner for when he gets back or do something he is not expecting! I wish you the best of luck, but first and foremost take care of YOU now. Hugs

Hi Lara,
It's really important for you and your husband to understand the impact that these hormonal changes have on the brain and mood. When our hormones shift and fall everything in our brains and bodies change. We eventually readjust but in the process we are very different due to this cascade of changes brought on by fluctuating hormones. Menopause and peri-menopause have been compared to drug withdrawal. We have had these hormones for many, many years and it is a huge shock to our bodies when they begin to decline. Anger is not an uncommon menopause symptom. Anger and irritability are right there on the list along with depression, anxiety and a general loss of interest in life - including all the things you used to love doing. The important thing to remember is that this is temporary. There are things you can do to help yourself like trying the supplements that you mentioned. I have been going through this for 8 months and have had every symptom on the list! But...I am getting so much better! I find the most important things to do are 1. gain as much information as possible about things that will take the edge off. For me, it has been a combination of maca, st johns wort, flax hull lignans (phytoestrogens) and ashwagandha as well as magnesium. 2. Eat REAL food and stay away from sugar and alcohol. 3. Get adequate rest...try taking melatonin if you have trouble sleeping 4. Exercise daily. I have had a LOT of aches and pains through this transition - but I have walked everyday. Recently I started practicing tai chi and Qi Gong. There are lots of you tube videos you can follow along with. 5. Do NOT beat yourself up. Would you talk to anyone else the way you talk to yourself!? NO! Explain what is happening to your husband. There are so many informative websites out there now where you can find symptom lists and explanations about what is going on in your body.
I hope this helps. You WILL be ok and you will be yourself again. It is a process and it won't happen overnight but it also won't last forever! Keep your faith and pray daily...it helps!

Hi Lara,
I am new to the site, joined 2 minutes ago and it's because of your post. I really feel for you!
I started this awful journey about a year and a half ago and have experienced some of the most incredible changes, anger and rage being the worst. Also the hardest to deal with!
The more months that go by without a period the crankier I get. I am usually a kind, compassionate person and now get these mean, nasty thoughts about people. I have blown up at one of my co-workers (who annoys me sometimes) and feel like a complete lunatic at times. The annoyance and anger I feel is really disproportionate to what it actually should be and I feel like a monster. Who knew that hormones could cause such a rapid, intense emotion? I literally feel "crazy" at times. I got a period after 4 months without and felt like myself again for the first time in months! People who have not experienced this cannot understand. It's hard to explain as well.
My doctor (who I work with every day so I trust her) told me that she can increase my Lexapro as ssri's are a common treatment for the mood problems that arise from perimenopause. I have had an anxiety disorder my whole life but this is totally different. She is not a big prescriber of meds and I do not like taking them so she encouraged me to start with vitamins b6 and vitamin e. Apparently those can help with a lot of the symptoms, I have researched this myself extensively but cannot remember anything these days as I walk around like a zombie from this new exhaustion :) Gotta laugh, anyway...
My plan until I know if these vitamins will help is to be conscious of my thoughts, pause before I speak (or yell lately), think before I react and try not to freak out on anyone :)
I have been helped by reading the posts of others if for no other reason than knowing that I am not a lunatic and this will not last forever.
I wish you peace and understanding from your man. Best of luck to you!!!!
Amy

Thank you Amy! I am glad you joined!! I have been taking a pill called Estroven. Its over the counter, costs about $10 at Walmart. It seems to be working. I feel more calmer and I finally had a period. My sex drive is back and my boyfriend told me I seem different in a good way. I don't feel so angry and I actually have been my happy, bubbly self. Things are going much better between my man and I, he even asked me for the 4th time to marry him. I guess I should, he has never left my side!!! Good luck in your journey and I am here if you need a listening ear!! Peace!!

Laurie