Oh, yes! It is true! Stress was the trigger that put me out of remission and got me diagnosed. There is not doubt in my mind.
Mary Ann

Although it can't be proven, there's no doubt that stress was probably the biggest contributor for getting this nasty disease.

-Marianne

Ditto to Mary Ann. That is exactly what happened to me. I try to talk to the people who love me, and I am looking for a new job.
(The stressor is my job.)

I find that the reverse is true more often for me... flares trigger stress...

But then again, I'm a therapist working in a mental health clinic. When I am stressed, help is... kind of readily available. Like I have 30 highly trained psychotherapists surrounding me three days a week, and even though I'm not their client, I can't stay stressed more than a few days while I'm working there! Previously, I think stress sometimes triggered flares.

In my case the stress causes me flares and those flares are the cause for more stress... and so the circle continues ad infinitum. This is in my opinion the circle which sums-up in a nutshell our difficulties SLE/MCTD causes.

What do I do about it?

I have noticed that taking a little bit more me-time helps me a lot, especially since I have started my new hobby:

I have started to learn how to play the piano (no teacher) from scratch (I am also learning how to read and write music) and I like to think about it, especially when another flare-up makes me so poorly that I have to lie down because I can't do anything else.

By thinking about my hobby prevents me from becoming too depressed about my situation.

Another relaxant is taking a hot bath for about 20 minutes with some medical herbs in the bath to calm down.

Listening to my favourite music like Bach, Haendel, Mozart and others calms me very as well and going for little walks and observing nature and people in a park can be very calming as well, or reading a book whilst trying to get better from a flare-up, whilst lying down etc.

There are many ways to calm yourself, it is only important to find out exactly what you like most of all to calm yourself in order to keep the stress levels a little bit at bay.

Unfortunately we are living in a very stressful time, politically, socially and economically. As we are suffering from SLE/MCTD we need to take more effort to keep our stress-levels, so that stress can't get out of hand ...

Good luck to all from Kristina.

Every time I am stressed or do too much I get flares. I think work is stressing me out too. However, I don't want to stop working. I am currently on Savella but I am not loving the side effects. Actually I only have one. I can't go number 2. I know TMI but it's a really bad one.

Jessica

Increased stress makes my joints hurt and I get easily fatigued. Unfortunately, my adult son moved back in with us, and he is not easy to live with. He will be with us for a while.

To cope with my home situation, I sometimes wear ear plugs, honestly we are like oil and water. Love him dearly, but cannot live with him. I don't work, and he works midnights.

We are giving him one last chance to finish his degree, he is 23. Stress is very bad for us. Just have to do whatever it takes to minimize it.

Thanks to everyone who replied! It's such a vicious cycle as Kristina said. And although I don't like that others are suffering, I do feel comforted to know I'm not alone.
My hubby says I need to learn how to manage my stress better and although that IRKS me, he's probably right!

Hello NancyDancy,

I wish you very good luck with the stress-management and also good luck to keep an eye on your flare-ups.

Flare-ups have been so often caused by too much stress with my career in my case and I wish I would have known about this before, because it might have saved me from many medical catastrophies, like: kidney failure (caused by high blood pressure which was caused by a medically untreated flare-up, then 10 years later: cerebral haemorrhages which were caused by high blood-pressure which was caused by a flare-up which was again not noticed by NHS-medics here in London, then 10 years later: a stroke which was caused by untreated high blood pressure and me severe drug-intolerance to blood pressure medications, which again was caused by a flare-up which was again not spotted by any of the NHS doctors I consulted at the time, and then 10 years later my current end stage kidney failure with a kidney function of 10-12% (no dialysis) which was caused again by a untreated high blood pressure which was caused again by a flare up which was caused by the menopause, which, again was not noticed by any of the NHS doctors or specialists I saw here regularly. These NHS doctors did not even notice that my Creatinine and Urea (Bun) were too high, which, as I have learnt much later, is a sure indicator to any medic that I am in end stage kidney failure.

After such horrendous experiences with the so-called "free" NHS medical treatment in England, I may be excused that I no longer believe that a "free" NHS health care exists in England and since then have paid for everything medical myself with cash because I really prefer to be save than sorry, at least I have a chance to see real medical professionals whilst paying cash for their medical services and that might give me a much better chance to survive.

Of course, money has bee and still is a big problem, but I only go to private doctors in an utmost medical urgency and I have had to cut down on everything else financially, including clothes and food and I study as much about medicine as I possibly can in order to survive.

One of my first problems was, of course, to figure out my very own methods to relax because not every method of stress-management suits everybody and the most important thing for me was to figure out my own ways to relax myself and to give my body and mind a little holiday with what suits me best.

As soon as I became aware that stress was always a trigger for my own flare-ups and it always has raised my blood pressure at the same time, this knowledge has helped me a lot to come to terms with "my" different variations of SLE/MCTD and has enabled me to manage my shortcomings much better in order to avoid flare-ups getting out of hand too much. With this knowledge and my own medical studies and my strict kidney-friendly and SLE/MCTD-friendly strict diet I have been able to keep myself in end stage kidney failure with only a 10-12% kidney function without dialysis for over seven (!!!) years !

It is, of course, hard work to figure out all these SLE/MCTD- nuances, but after a few years I did notice a slow improvement, it was not much, but my medical situation became a little bit more manageable. Especially because I am no longer rebelling when my body is not allowing me to get up at all and I know that I have to take a rest. I now accept this fact a little better and that fact alone helps me a lot to recover much quicker from these flare-ups-up-and-downs.

I wish you good luck and all the best from Kristina.

Oh my gosh Kristina...you poor thing. I mean, I've been through a huge run of doctors and tests too...but never to the point of causing the kinds of things that happened to you. I don't know how you're not FURIOUS. It's good because anger only hurts you, not them.
I'm so very glad you've found ways to deal with your stress better. May I ask what techniques do suit you? I'm still trying to find my way!
Thanks from Nancy

Thanks Nancy,
you are right, I would get even more hurt and my little health left would get furter damaged, if I would allow myself be eaten up with anger about the NHS-corruption in England or the uncounted useless NHS doctors I had the misfortune to come across in the past 32 years...mind you, I have to say here that I have hardly ever consulted with an English NHS doctor in the English NHS "free" medical service...

...After analysing my problem with the NHS from all possible angles I have realized that England is very much steeped in a social system which still makes a huge difference between the rich and the poor, between the masters and the servants, between the aristocrats and the non-aristocrats ... and since the NHS health system in England is a "free for all health system" and because so much money gets lost within the NHS corruption - there is really only a "free" NHS health care left for the rich and the powerful and the influential...and ... must not to forget the many uncounted religious and racial minority groups who made sure to have many "of their own" working as NHS doctors to look after "their own"...

All other NHS-patients have often bad luck stories to tell - if they are lucky enough to be still alive. If you look at the NHS health system in this context you may understand that I regard myself as very lucky to have survived all my medical catastrophies with the NHS ...

All my neighbours who were "treated" on the NHS and had health problems of whatever sort, are not alive any longer... They were either put on a NHS waiting-list to see a NHS specialist - until it was much too late - or they were never diagnosed and were sent from one NHS doctor to another until it was too late and they were never given a chance and died... courtesy of the NHS because my neighbours were not influential, they were not rich and they had no aristocratic titles...and because of that fact they did not receive a real professional NHS "free" health care when they needed it...

I regard myself as very lucky that I have survived in this jungle of NHS-corruption and that my body and soul withstood and gave me a chance to survive.

After all: there is no such thing as a free lunch, is there? And to believe that a "free" health service for all" could survive without huge problems of corruption would be very naive and foolish...

Here are some of my methods to relax :

After the stroke I could not move my right hand/arm/leg and so I started to go for as many little walks as possible, mainly in Parks/botanical studies etc. and when it is raining I go for little walks in a Museum/Gallery. That is very convenient, because there are many possibilities to sit down, take a rest and study a painting ... that always relaxes me a lot and gives me a chance to learn more...

I also have started to learn how to play the piano and that helps my hands/arm and it relaxes me a lot as well and keeps "my grey little cells" going when I am learning a new piece of music.

I also have started to collect some classical LP's (records) which can be bought for very little money in second hand junk-shops and charity shops and I make a point to listen every day to an LP to relax. I have specialized in Baroque music with compositions by J.S. Bach and his sons, Haendel, Vivaldi (one of my absolute favourites), Albinioni and many others and their compositions are very soothing and extremely calming and relaxing. ..

I also read books about these composers (mainly books written and published BEFORE the 1920's to avoid any "artistic- licence-angle" of the writer.... and that again is very interesting because most of these composers had a pretty hard life themselves, but they never ever "let it out" in their music - their music is still the best medicine to come across when I need to feel at home with some music to build myself up again... I also take many of these composers and their characters as an example not to let myself be beaten so easily either by my disease or the corrupt NHS-health system or the fact that I have to pay for all my health care out of my own pocket... including my own blood-tests to see how my kidneys are still functioning in my end stage kidney failure...all this is very, very hard for me to manage financially,.. but I don't have any other choice.. because I really wish to survive...

To make time for my relaxation with either listening to my music or learning and playing the piano I have stopped to read newspapers and magazines and I have also stopped to watch the television (TV) .

It also relaxes me a lot to study and read as much as possible about my particular rare variation of MCTD/SLE and all my other diseases like my chronic kidney disease and my knowledge has relaxed me a lot because I am no longer confronted that much with the unknown of MCTD/SLE .... mind you there are still surprises, but at least I have made a good start to face it and deal with it in a most economical way to save as much money as possible to make my decision when I really need to consult with a private doctor because I can't really afford the costs to pay for a private doctor, ...ut there is no other choice when I need urgent medical help and assistance and I have to bear the financial burden of my SLE/MCTD and pay the doctor and cut down on all my other essentials instead...

I wish you good luck with your search for your own relaxation,
best wishes from Kristina.

I feel like its a vicious cycle. Stress increases flares which also increase my stress and so on and so forth. It is impossible to be stress free, especially if you work with people.
What are some good ways to de-stress in a fast pace work environment other than breathing and "thinking good thoughts" ?

A little exercise helps. On good days it is best to go outside and "be one with nature"! LOL! I find that working in my garden or just walking in my yard, looking at the plants and wildlife (except for seeing the deer and groundhogs eating my plants!) is relaxing. I can walk around the block and it helps. If I am agitated, I walk fast. It wears me out and I can sleep. Sleep puts me a little space from my reason for anxiety and I can look at it differently.
Mary Ann