March/April/May 2018 IVF Buddies Community Group
Ladies going through IVF this year supporting each other through the process!
Hello! While nothing major to report, I figure now may be a good time to get vocal in the forum... Cycle Day 9 is coming-up this week, with egg retrieval not too far behind. I am feeling (cautiously) optimistic, as I know there is a lot out of my control here.
I don't want my positivity to sound insensitive, nor do I want to be naive. I am now 36, and we have been trying naturally for a year to get pregnant. After blood work and ultrasound last Fall showed no negative results for me (normal FSH, AMH, general physiology),we turned to my partner, and BINGO: his semen analysis resulted in "male factor infertility" (low #, speed, morph). Discussions with my OB/GYN and IVF clinic led us into IVF (plus, my insurance covers the bulk).
So here we are. One the one hand, I can't help but feel really good: it's not me, I should have quality eggs; on the other hand, I am very anxious for the actual results, and whether we can get egg and sperm to miraculously meet, and later, successfully transfer. We are doing PGS, and ICSI. Plus our clinic recommends FET, so if we have embryos, it'll be weeks before transfer. Oh, the wait!
I am internalizing and embracing my health and what is/not in my control, which actually makes me feel really good, but I can't help but feel scared about what's around the corner - possible failure, and feeling like it's my fault. One day at a time sounds cliché, but guess I'd better start embracing the motto... Strength in my heart, clarity in my mind... One day at a time... Just writing this note feels cathartic!
No big ask of any of you, though I do hope that whether good or bad, I can continue to "journal" among folks who are experiencing the IVF journey, each unique in their own right. I have appreciated reading your stories, and welcome your observations of mine.
mrsmooney: We are doing ICSI (doc recommended, and insurance covered). We are also doing PGS - it wasn't recommended, but we are exercising all possibilities.
I am feeling good, and exhausted. The butterflies in my stomach leading-up to today make me realize there was a lot anxiety and adrenalin - and we're not done yet, not even close. Regardless, remaining positive and motivated. Appreciate your continued support!
You've got this! Good luck!
I received another update today, seemingly more promising. The majority are in the "cleavage stage sweet spot" to make it to blastocyst, but there's fragmentation occurring, and the average attrition for my age has the doc estimating 5 blastocysts will make it to the biopsy stage; and of those, the rule of averages suggests only 50% of those will be "normal".
...All still a lot to take in. Intellectually I understand and remain cautious, but emotionally I am pleased that the story took a turn for the better and could continue that way for my very first IVF cycle. So much remains out of my control, which incites fear and anxiety and makes it hard to parse-out the "good news" in all of this - was this egg cohort "bad", or is my physiology worse than I thought? I am anxiously awaiting the next update, and look forward to arriving at a decision/next steps soon.
As you said, it's out of your control now, so try your best to stay positive and not think about it too much right now. (I know that this is easier said than done! But, try!) One day at a time. When you get the results, you can decide what to do from there. Keeping you in my thoughts!
I am managing to ride the roller coaster, which has been particularly hard given I am still in relatively rough shape from the retrieval - anyone else experience severe bloating?!?!
As of Monday, I have 12 embryos out to freeze/biopsy. I can't believe what a difference in the number! But also recognize the biopsies are another chapter in the saga. I should have results within 10 days - the ever present agony of waiting.
Lucky number 12 has me feeling more optimistic compared to last week, so I will revel in that a bit. Given the continued belly bloat, I am also indulging in a lot of gatorade and salty foods - while kind of fun, I am not feeling particularly healthy/like myself... repeat: Strength in my heart and clarity in my mind...
I did like 7 egg retrievals and I bloated after each one. The more eggs collected, the worse the bloat was. I remember being bloated for several days, and it would decrease after I got my period. I hope you're feeling good again though, but if you're very very bloated for a long time, tell your doc. So, are you planning to do a FET straight away?
For me, they originally retrieved 23 eggs, so as you can imagine, the bloat was terrible. About a week later, with a few days of electrolytes and salty foods really helped (I did mention to doc, who was just glad to hear it was incrementally improving), and i just got my period so my whole body is feeling "deflated" - in a good way!
Biopsy results should be in this week, so I'll have to wait on those results and the embryologist's recommendation on which to transfer. Given my recent period, I will likely start BC today and wait for FET protocol. Seems to me like transfer could happen by June... (!!!)... but one step at a time...
I'm currently in the birth control pill phase for my second egg retrieval. I'll start the stim meds again in a couple weeks. Trying to focus on being more relaxed this time around. It should be better since I know what to expect now. Crossing my fingers that this will be the final egg retrieval cycle and then we can move to FET in July, but one step at a time! :)
LovelyLavendar, good luck on your upcoming cycle as well and keep us posted!
My transfer date is set for June 21st, so round deux of meds protocol begins shortly. I am hoping that I react well, and my lining is ready to go in a few weeks.
Hope114 - keep me posted on your protocol, and how you're reacting, any questions/concerns that arise - will all be helpful for me/all of us!