Loneliness Support Group
Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...
I know that loneliness means you're feeling alone even when you're with people or around people, but you're really not alone, spiritually if you think about it; for two reasons. One, God is walking right beside you guiding your every move and for two, you're only as lonely as you allow yourself to feel because you don't have to feel down and out or depressed because it seems like no one wants to pay attention or interact with you all the time. YOU can change how YOU feel at any given time, day or night, whether you're truly physically alone at the moment or not. So, this post is just confirming that you have control over YOUR own feelings and reactions to YOUR surroundings, not anyone and everyone else. This has been a long and trying concept for me to learn and I still haven't perfected it or grasped it fully. I get lonely a lot still and its harder for me to remember that I can change the way I feel when I want or need to. Its not up to anyone or everyone else at all. I guess this post if for me to remind myself again of this fact. I just hope that it can help someone else that is feeling lonely at some point as well.
I wept. I lay in bed, I wondered when would be my turn. Would I ever have a turn? I had lived a life isolated all the way through, lonely, miserable, rejected. My own husband never let me speak in public, let alone invite friends over. Prior to that, bullied in school. OMG the violin, it's getting really loud now isn't it. It's drowning out my voice that violin it's playing soooo loud.
Anyway I cried, and cried. I cried up my whole life. And then I lay there, feeling very low, while the neighbour laughed. and everyone laughed. And I thought
'how do I know he's having a good time? How do I know he's not laughing, desperate to fit in, depressed, lonely, isolated'
And I realised I didn't know. I had no way whatsoever to know.
I realised that although I was not having my turn yet, I might yet have my turn. That I was only 43, and that time was still on my side, or at least not my outright enemy. That I could find a life, and grow it, blow on it like tinder. Water it like a seed. find a place to settle down, and sit there, and grow roots, and never move again. Just sit and grow and meet neighbours, one at a time, over a few years. And learn to have friends, and invite them over...
I realised I don't have to hurry. And when I'm in a time where I don't know how to communicate, or feel too anxious to invite guessts - I don't have to. Time is still on my side. I can get through this stage and out the other side, and see what the weather's like when I get there.
My life has moved a LONG way since that night. But I have never cried myself to sleep over loneliness ever again. I have realised I don't need to be lonely. My time will come in its own time.
I've worked on the anxiety, which needs a lot of alone time to heal. Now I'm moving into a more social time of my life. I can feel it coming. Just staying put and sticking things out and working hard and being friendly and kind slowly build you a life. It's all you need to do.