Loneliness Support Group
Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...
...or at least it did in my case.
I don't have an easy time making friends. I'm not really sure why that is, but I wish someone would tell me. I'm overly shy and expect anyone I meet to flee in horror over whatever it is that keeps me alone. I lost my fiance in November (2013). He was all I had. He was my best friend, my support, and my lover. I think I made myself even more scarce than I normally do. A few months ago, I started talking to people online. I miss having a friend. I hate being so isolated. Nothing ever panned out. Last weekend I started talking to a man who lives the next town over from me. He's 16 years older than me, but it was nice to have someone to talk to. He was very insistent on meeting. I am not the type of person who meets people online right away so I said no several times. He was quite persistent. Should have been a sign, but I think my judgement was off as I had a few drinks. Plus the thought of hanging out with someone was very tempting. So even though I was apprehensive, I met him. I had no idea what he looked like and upon meeting him realized that he looked very much like my father. We went for a walk into the park. Nearly the middle of the night in Maine. My senses awoke and told me 'This is just messed up!" I nearly had a panic attack and told him I had to leave. He walked me back to my car and we talked a little more. He was very interested in me and tried to kiss me, but I got away calmly and politely. He called me and texted me several times the next day. I'd say 15-20 calls. 10 texts. I told him he reminded me of my dad. He said "you're not into that?" He continued to text/call. I told him I was not interested. He said "Sorry to bother you." He has called me and texted me every day since. I went against everything to drive to break me out of my shell and it has all backfired.
In the end I am afraid that this will make it even harder for me to meet people. A new fear to add to the bundle. I wish I had someone to kick me in the arse that day. I am not sure what I am trying to convey in this message. I think I just needed to vent.
I don't have an easy time making friends. I'm not really sure why that is, but I wish someone would tell me. I'm overly shy and expect anyone I meet to flee in horror over whatever it is that keeps me alone. I lost my fiance in November (2013). He was all I had. He was my best friend, my support, and my lover. I think I made myself even more scarce than I normally do. A few months ago, I started talking to people online. I miss having a friend. I hate being so isolated. Nothing ever panned out. Last weekend I started talking to a man who lives the next town over from me. He's 16 years older than me, but it was nice to have someone to talk to. He was very insistent on meeting. I am not the type of person who meets people online right away so I said no several times. He was quite persistent. Should have been a sign, but I think my judgement was off as I had a few drinks. Plus the thought of hanging out with someone was very tempting. So even though I was apprehensive, I met him. I had no idea what he looked like and upon meeting him realized that he looked very much like my father. We went for a walk into the park. Nearly the middle of the night in Maine. My senses awoke and told me 'This is just messed up!" I nearly had a panic attack and told him I had to leave. He walked me back to my car and we talked a little more. He was very interested in me and tried to kiss me, but I got away calmly and politely. He called me and texted me several times the next day. I'd say 15-20 calls. 10 texts. I told him he reminded me of my dad. He said "you're not into that?" He continued to text/call. I told him I was not interested. He said "Sorry to bother you." He has called me and texted me every day since. I went against everything to drive to break me out of my shell and it has all backfired.
In the end I am afraid that this will make it even harder for me to meet people. A new fear to add to the bundle. I wish I had someone to kick me in the arse that day. I am not sure what I am trying to convey in this message. I think I just needed to vent.
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Can you identify these rom-coms from just a screenshot from the middle of the films? This is a multiple choice quiz so even if you're not entirely sure you can always take a guess and at least have a 25% chance of getting it right anyway, so why not have a go?! https://www.buzzfeed.com/alysaurus688/rom-com-screenshot-trivia-quiz
I am just wondering if how you reacted to this guy wasn't out of stupidity, but rather fear of getting hurt. To me, that sounds more likely. Best to you.
That's a probability too. That I was afraid to get hurt. I am afraid to get hurt. Seems everyone I love leaves me or turns on me. Heck my own sister threatened to kill my son and me. You lose a level of trust somewhere along the way. Anyway, thank you for your insight.
Next time you reach out you can be reassured that you can handle things :)
I would look to your interests-crafts/hobbies which you introduce you to others!
I would try some kind of singles meetup group in your area and age range....our group is singles over 50 and there are others for 30-40 singles in our area too...these groups host events that you can choose to go to depending on the event of course...maybe a bowling day or dinner out or a dance at a park with an amphitheater....we have had all those in our group...you choose which you go to and can see who else is going....for a woman the men are less than the women in my group by 3/1 but for the men we have our issues too....LOL
hugs and welcome back Kate....you've been here before I think if I remember correctly...??
Sadly, I can say I actually do understand what you are saying about people leaving you and turning on you. Everyone it seems in my personal life has done that to me including my own siblings and mother of my daughter. Even so call church friends / family seem to have done that. Not being paranoid or anything. Just what I have experience and to that, the broken trust one too many times. My trust in people is very little and limited with the expectations of having it broken. Pain of having people turn on you and break your trust gets to you after a while. Changes you even if you dont want it to. Live it daily, but I still refuse to give up on people. Someday, somewhere, I am going to find someone who will actually care and not break my trust ( or heart ). I can not let the pain of what others have done to me dictate my desires for better and happiness. They dont get to have that kind of power over me, over my life. I really hope the best for you.
i think theres that but i also agree loneliness leads to stupidity
Stick with same-sex or gay men if you're just looking for friendship. If you're just looking for friendship, and are on a DATING, site, be very clear in your status and your introductory paragraph that you're just looking for friendship.