I just recently left my bad marriage after being with my x for 24 years. Although I enjoy not having to walk on eggshells all the time I feel so alone. My kids are grown and busy with their own lives so I spend a great deal of time alone. I don't really have any friends and I find it hard to meet people. I have met a few people online I grew close to but then all of a sudden they would just up and stop talking and be gone. That always hurt. It happened to me recently with a guy I was talking to...I thought the world of him and thought he was a true friend. One day we were the best friends and the next he was gone. No explanation nothing..gone! I keep rereading his last email and trying to figure out what happened but I can't figure it out. It broke my heart so it makes that I find it hard to trust people. I spend a lot of time crying and I hate that. I am beginning to think there must be something wrong with me..my x told me for years that everybody including my family hated me..that I was fat and ugly and no other man would have want me. I tried hard not to believe those words but over the years they ate away at me and I am beginning to think he was right all along. Here I am crying again as I type this....I hate feeling so lonely all the time.
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