Loneliness Support Group

Loneliness is an emotional state in which a person experiences a powerful feeling of emptiness and isolation. Loneliness is more than the feeling of wanting company or wanting to do something with another person. Loneliness is a feeling of being cut off, disconnected and alienated from other people. The lonely person may find it difficult or even impossible to have any...

11,068 Members
10,372 Posts
2 Online
Mental Health
/ Loneliness Support Group

Getting over obsession due to loneliness?

ranias
ranias
Hey all. This is my first post here so sorry if this isn't the right place.

I feel like this is my worst and loneliest time in my life. I have had troubles with anxiety and self-confidence all my life, and now that I have graduated college with an aerospace engineering degree, I am having trouble finding a job. Alot of my friends are doing great things in their lives, and I feel very alone.

My loneliness makes me reach out for a relationship, but the way I go about it is often very obsessive. The most recent girl I've talked to has said she doesn't want a relationship right now. I tried to use her to make myself happy, and I was persistently messaging her despite saying she doesn't want to talk to me because I was making her uncomfortable. Right now, I'm trying to kick my habit of cyberstalking and comparing myself to others by quitting and blocking all social media.

I'm trying to stop this urge to check up on her. I worry about her, and I have the thought in the back of my mind that she will change her mind about me. She has body image and self-confidence problems that I feel like I could help her with, but she doesn't want to talk to me until I get over her. I feel so gross for being like this.

I'm trying to get my life back on track before using social media again. Recently, I've been looking into possibly joining the Coast Guard.
billwfriend
billwfriend
stalking in any form is unwanted and bad deal for everyone involved...u need to chill....that is horrid that your still contacting her as she has said leave her alone....bad move....joining coast guard is ok but how about applying to Houston NASA....I have friend that has worked there since she was 18 and she is in mid 40s now...makes over $106K per year now....and she is pretty as all get out but just out of bad divorce...not available and not in my league but she likes being my friend so I am a friend....that is how it must be...and I am ok with it...you need to understand boundaries....your way over the line and not because of social media but your behavior in general
ranias
ranias
I kind of wish I could delete this now.

My job search is very hard because there's alot of competition, and I graduated with no experience and low gpa. I've gotten alot of advice on this already. I really just need to start working somewhere.

I've talked to my therapist once about my cyberstalking, and she said it might be a form of OCD. I already feel really guilty about it, and I usually don't message. The girl I was talking to said it was ok for me to message her at first, but then said she is uncomfortable talking to me while I am crushing on her. We used to be friends, and I hope to be friends with her again in the future.

I'm quitting social media until I feel better about my life because I feel like I compare myself to others too much, the things I post make people uncomfortable, and social media enables me to cyberstalk, which I never want to do again.
SweetPetite
SweetPetite
No reason to be embarrassed or wish that you never wrote that post. You were being honest. The important thing for all of us-not just you-is to try to move forward with our lives and not keep repeating the same mistakes over and over. I am guilty as charged and much older than you! Lol.
enigmaticloner
enigmaticloner
I can relate to feeling lonely and wanting to reach out to people for a relationship, but it just doesn't work well for me either. I've met quite a few women but barely any have shown any interest. It really leaves me feeling lonely and lacking the confidence to try again at times. I've gone through that same thing with social media, trust me, I wound up deleting one of my SM pages just recently because it was doing me no good. Seeing other people with their seemingly happy lives, and then me sitting there looking at pictures of people and women that I've failed at trying to have relationships with, it just isn't good for the mind. I really feel that SM has made it even harder, for people with anxiety problems especially to meet others and make new friends. With so many different websites and apps and everything, people seem to just be too distracted to pay attention to one another anymore. It's really quite sad.
Posts You May Be Interested In