Life Beyond Abuse Community Group
We are a group of Childhood and/or Domestic Abuse Survivors sharing our experiences of life after abuse. This is a forum of hope, encouragement, advice, humor, and empowerment for men and women alike who are dedicated to healing the damage that abuse caused in their lives and conquering the effects abuse left behind.
Hey Everyone!! Miss all of you guys!!! So sorry that I've been so busy and haven't been able to keep up much, but I am still totally committed to getting this group moving along once I get settled in New Jersey!
We got a house, FINALLY! It's probably the biggest house I have every lived in, in my entire life. All I can really say about that is that I'm still in shock. I never, ever believed that I would reach the point in life where I could live in a nice neighborhood, in a nice house, with friendly neighbors. NEVER THOUGHT. I used to dream about this kind of thing.....just to have something so simple as a nice house. Now that its becoming my reality, I'm not so sure what to think.
Sounds odd, right? To have such blessings and not know how to feel or what to think of it all? I'm sure anyone out there would tell me....enjoy it! Be happy! But thanks to a lifetime of abuse that kept me near the poverty line.....this all seems so unreal to me. I haven't quite wrapped my brain around it all.
And still, nearly two years later (July 23) I still feel the same way about my relationship. It's healthy. We talk things out when issues arise. Nothing sits overnight. Nothing festers. Nothing brews. He genuinely loves me and I genuinely love him. And everything we do, we do it together. I have a real family....not just me and the kids and some slug sitting on my furniture acting like Hitler. I have a true partner. I'm still in shock about that, too.
Unfortunately, I don't have time to contemplate it all....too much to get done. I have 17 days to complete what I need to do in this house....pack, paint, clean.....and on day 18, we're pulling out of this town and getting on the highway....heading to a new house, a new town, a new life. Phew! That's a lot!
We got a house, FINALLY! It's probably the biggest house I have every lived in, in my entire life. All I can really say about that is that I'm still in shock. I never, ever believed that I would reach the point in life where I could live in a nice neighborhood, in a nice house, with friendly neighbors. NEVER THOUGHT. I used to dream about this kind of thing.....just to have something so simple as a nice house. Now that its becoming my reality, I'm not so sure what to think.
Sounds odd, right? To have such blessings and not know how to feel or what to think of it all? I'm sure anyone out there would tell me....enjoy it! Be happy! But thanks to a lifetime of abuse that kept me near the poverty line.....this all seems so unreal to me. I haven't quite wrapped my brain around it all.
And still, nearly two years later (July 23) I still feel the same way about my relationship. It's healthy. We talk things out when issues arise. Nothing sits overnight. Nothing festers. Nothing brews. He genuinely loves me and I genuinely love him. And everything we do, we do it together. I have a real family....not just me and the kids and some slug sitting on my furniture acting like Hitler. I have a true partner. I'm still in shock about that, too.
Unfortunately, I don't have time to contemplate it all....too much to get done. I have 17 days to complete what I need to do in this house....pack, paint, clean.....and on day 18, we're pulling out of this town and getting on the highway....heading to a new house, a new town, a new life. Phew! That's a lot!
I can't even begin to wrap my head around the thought that I could one day have a life like that. I can see it when I watch other women living that kind of life, but for some reason there is this weird vacuum-like black hole feeling when I try to imagine myself having it.
I know I want it, but I guess the belief just isn't there that it will ever happen.
Do you mind sharing how you met your current partner. This is another area I find impossible. I'm on dating sites and have communicated with several men, but I get this weird sense that it's all for nothing, so why bother.