Life After Divorce Support Group
This community is dedicated to starting over after a divorce. With the marriage over, how do individuals begin a new chapter in their lives and what hurdles do they face? Divorce is often one of the most traumatic periods in a person's life. Studies show it is the second-most stressful event in life, after the death of a spouse.
soon2bcatlady
I asked for a divorce in November 2015. I didn't really want a divorce I was angry. My ex husband who never wanted me to work or go to school made me feel like he was unsupportive when i did finally attend college. I started to get frustrated with him, he would interrupt me while I studied or start huge fights before major tests, I started spending more time out with friends. One night he compared me going out with mutual friends we had known for over ten years to the four times he had lied to me and spent evenings, some over night with women i had never met. it caused a huge argument. I was already mad and stressed and angry that he could even compare the two. I told him to leave me alone let me cool down, he kept pushing and pushing, so i said I wanted a divorce. As soon as I said it i knew I didn't mean it I just wanted to cool down, instead he admitted to cheating on me, with one of those girls. But he says we were fighting at the time and it was years ago so it shouldn't matter. I was soo sooo mad and soo heart broken so I stuck with it. If we had talked calmly maybe we could have worked it out. Instead he spent every day of November and December telling me what a sorry bitch I was. How I was a user. How he hated me and thought I was trash. I left my home and My children ( he made all the money and I make nothing ) to attend Nursing school five hours away. Once I was away we started talking again, we got along, we laughed, we flirted. when I came to visit we continued to sleep together. I was selfish. I had a plan. I wanted to wait and share it with him. So in February we signed and finalized our divorce. That night we slept together and before I headed home, we made intimate plans for my visit the next two weeks away, I even asked him out on a date so we could talk. He agreed. Two weeks later I came to visit. I get there with my bags and my expectations. Hug and kiss my kids and ask wheres dad. He was on a date. I waited for him to get home for a few hours. When he comes home he tells me he thinks I should sleep on the couch as it wouldn't be fair to the new girl he is now seeing. i was shocked. I took the kids and we spent the weekend in a hotel. A week later I called to tell my ex what it was I wanted to talk about. I told him i wanted to discuss starting over. our marriage was based on a lie. and we didnt get along for the first 7 years but I felt like if we actually dated and got to know each other we could find what we lost and make our family right again, he said no. He said he already loved this new girl and he wanted to see where it was going to go. I was sad, I texted him a lot. telling him how much i loved him. there were a lot of tear filled phone calls. He blocked my number and will only communicate via email and only if it important stuff about our kids. He has been with this girl for less than three months. Tonight my teenage son called me very angry. Dad informed the kids tonight that while they were with me over the summer his new girlfriend was going to be moving in with her daughter. My teenage son isnt stupid, he knew I slept in the same room as his dad up until he met his new girlfriend. Im just in shock, and sad for my kids. I cant take them yet. Im in nursing school and cant work while I attend, They tried to tell there dad they were uncomfortable with the situations but he made them feel bad for not caring about his feelings. Saying that he deserved to be happy and they shouldn't complain. I just feel like he is rushing all of this. My heart is still broken. Did he care that little about me. I mean im just so confused. Has anyone delt with this? Sorry this is so long. Im just feeling stressed.
You are pretty much screwed , your husband will choose himself over you and the kids he claims to be a parent of
If your kids want to be with you custody wise, then you fight tooth and nail for that
You go to court file for support and child support , you can make it work, your kids need to know that they are at least one parents priority or they'll be mindfucked forever
You don't deserve this shitstorm nor do they
It is not fair
But you can weather the storm and live & thrive down the road