Sorry you are going through the aftermath of divorce.You are grieving the loss of your marriage and it will hurt. Crying is therapeutic and helps relieve pent up stress and emotions. I do hope you have someone in 'real' life that you can turn to and talk with. You may want to seek out counseling and/or a divorce support group in your area. Try googling Divorce Care to see if there are any meetings in your area. And of course you can always find an listening ear here.

Ya, unfortunately, it's a process -- the crying, the depression, sadness, not wanting to get out. This will all change one day. Whether you filed for divorce or the other one did, there is still the process that we go thru over losing a mate. I filed and went thru all the emotions that you are having.

Thank you both for your support. For some reason I cant seem to wrap my head around all of this. Dragging myself out of bed everyday is a battle. If it werent for my boys, I feel that my depression would be a lot worse. I lead a very sheltered life, so being around divorce is hard for me to understand. My parents have been together for 35 yrs. I cry, I journal and I have been seeing a therapist for 4 yrs now. I am just so sad.

Me too twinsmom. Latley I have been relaly struggling again and am thinking about possibly taking meds to help with my mood. The mood swings are so hard tot ake, but are normal when going through this.

twinsmom and tcl18 sorry you are feeling so low and I understand that my saying you will feel this way as it is part of the grieving process is not a lot of help. But I assure you that this normal and you are going to have good days and bad days just go with the flow acknowledge these feelings and soon there will be fewer of the down days. If you do not acknowledge your feelings and try to sweep them into a corner at some point you will have to come back and deal with them. You will need to accept how you are feeling so that you can find a way to put them in the past and only you can do this for you. This takes work and sometimes feelings are a little stubborn I have been here and it was difficult but I survived and so will you.

Thank you for your support Gwinnie and tcl18. The advice that you all have given to me. I am trusting in what you all are telling that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. But going through the tunnel I just admit is very dark and lonely. I have yet to see the light but the support that you all are giving me is great, letting me know that there is one, is a relief.

I left my husband almost three years ago and the pain is still there. I lost him to prescription drugs. He was such a good good man until then and he started emotionally abusing us but for thirty years he was wonderful. It is so freaking sad. It is just sad.

Keep journaling. Keep crying. Journal. Cry. Do what you have to do to live a good life and do the best you can for the boys but you also have to take care of YOU and most likely that is all about crying and journaling.

And keep talking to us here. We get it.

You are stronger than you think... I found I had to view myself as in a fight, for my strength & sanity. You have to tell yourself not to be a victim, treat yourself kindly and eat properly.

When you find your inner strength, it comes with a wisdom and you can start to view the world differently.

Crying works for so long, then your brain starts asking "What good is that?", that's when you are winning.

You will become stronger and your family will see the difference and hopefully you will all be able to make some happy memories together.

Don't give into depression, fight it - Know what it is, when it hits and tell it to do one... It's your chance to find yourself and life all over... it just freakin hurts bad for a while and then you climb into the light again X

im right here with you feeling exactly the same way. i cry all day and cant find the energy to get out of bed. my eyes are constanly swollen to the point that my boss thinks i'm doing drugs (i'm not). i'm seeing a therapist and she helps a little but after a few days my mind is once again consumed by a thousand different feelings, memories, and emotions. the divorce was a mutual decision but i cant shake the feeling it was a mistake and now i wonder if i should go back to him. on my better days i know i did the right thing. so confused.

Same here! I was married for 33 years. I wanted the divorce and he did not. It wasn't a bad marriage, but things just kept getting unbearable. It's been almost a year and I am still feeling confused. Did I do the right hing? I don't want him back as a husband, but I still get sad, depressed and feel downright miserable. About a month ago, my ex told me that he was engaged. He had a girlfriend a week after we split. I do well and then some little thing or some piece of information will just get me and I will fall back into all these emotions and feelings that I don't like. I am so ready for that part to be over and to be able to move forward without bad feelings or emotions. Does it ever end completely?

It's funny how divorce can be so confusing. It's so easy to stay in our comfort zone. I am now divorcing for the third time. First husband was into drugs, second husband a cheater and bad human being, third husband was just always angry and miserable with his own inner demons. So three strikes for me. But although I am confused,sad, afraid and lonely. I am in a place now in my life where I say I take full responsibility of my past and my future.
I'm setting goals for myself. When I get into that gray, dark zone, I stop myself and say hey, stop that, what's that going to accomplish. I say to myself I am blessed with my health, my job, my children. I force myself to look at life in a positive light. Sometimes it works and sometimes I eat a bowl of ice cream.
My advice is don't stay in the gray zone to long. Go for walks, drives and give yourself a good pat on the back. We are all just human beings trying to live a good life.

You may be suffering from co-dependent issues. I still suffer from being divorced from a narcissistic ex. It has been 9 years.... 2 kids, now 15 and 16. Always fighting for child support. Very hard but force myself to stay positive. We are all here to help.