Lesbian Relationship Challenges Support Group

This community is for those who are in a gay marriage, and the unique challenges that may be had in a same-sex relationship. Find support and talk to others in a same-sex marriage, and get advice from the experiences of other members.

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Possible relationship?

Shelby-Hamel
Shelby-Hamel
So I feel that there may or may not be an impending relationship in my future. And one of the biggest problems is my own fear. When I met her she claimed to be straight, but now she says things like "Whoever I fall in love with, man or woman, it doesn't matter." And I'm terrified that if I give her my heart, I won't be enough for her. That someday she'll want a man because she'll realize she's straight and that she was just curious. I'm terrified and I feel the impending confession that she likes me coming and I don't know how to feel. I don't know if I want this relationship or not, even though I'm head over heels for this girl... Help?
deleted_user
deleted_user
I just joined Daily Strength and I can tell you, as somebody who has been in a relationship with a straight woman for years, it is not without it's challeges. I worried all the time in the early years that she was going to wake up one day and "come to her senses" or that she would leave for a man. I don't worry about that anymore. After 12 years she has never strayed and I have talked with her at great length about what its like for her to be in love with me when she isn't gay. She tells me she just doesn't see me as a woman but as a person and it doesn't feel strange for but natural.
This isn't necessarily intended to be advice on how you should proceed with your own situation. It is very hard to be secure in a relationship like this. I am just saying sexuality is a fluid thing for some people and it is possible to fall in love with members of the same or opposite sex, weather identifying as gay or straight. We fall in love from the inside out, especially women.
Bottom line though dear, if you are not already fully in this thing and you already have doubts, it may be safest for your heart to back out of it.
HeatherDawn88
HeatherDawn88
I'm SUPER feminine looking, and in a lot of my relationships, my girlfriend thinks I'm going to leave her for a man, or that I want one. When it comes to sexuality, there are so many questions. When it comes to love, there are few.

All I can say is be there for her, until she figures it out. If she confesses that she likes you, confess your feelings to her! Say you like her, but you're hesitant. If she's serious about you, she'll understand and help you through your doubts, as you will help her through finding herself.

What have you got to lose? You can only gain an amazing woman through this experience. If nothing happens, then you're right back where you started. :)

Good luck!