Learn to love yourself Community Group
This is a group for people who struggle to accept and love themselves for who they are. I hope that members will share there real feelings and the postive ways in which they are starting to love themselves more
Living with a chronic condition can be so depressing and lonely. It feels as no one understands.I Have chronic primary lympedema of both feet and legs. This is a condition that results because the lymphatic system is not functioning properly and then causes fluid retention.
I am not saying it is easy to live with a chronic condition when you are old, but it is so much difficult when you are young. I have lived with this condition since i was 16 years today i am 29 years. The condition was not as bad in my teens but it still shattered my self esteem then, but now it has affected me even more because it is progressive. I feel like part of me has died or to be honest i just feel like i died sometime ago and contiunue to exist . I have such a deep seated sadness from within and i feel so empty and lonely.
It is because of this condition my boyfriend broke up with me four years ago and i have never dated ever since then, it also affeted my career life as i had to give up my job as a Chemist because my feet could no longer carry me. I then had to go and pursue my second degree in Information technology that i completed last year to get me a job that requires me to sit.I am glad i am done and now looking for a job but part of me is sad because i am not really passionate about my second degree.
Right now i just feel like life has come to a stand still. I am so so sad most of the times and i cant seem to shake of the feeling.
Right now at the age of 29 i feel like i have nothing to hold onto, all mys sisters are married with kids and most of my friends are either in a stable relationship or married. They also have houses and cars ( not really a big deal because one day i will also buy those). But the relationship part is the saddest part.
I feel like nothing is going right at the moment , i am so depressed right now. It seems my whole life just revolves around lympedema. When we go out people my age are addressed up , but as for me it is hard to find the right size of shoes because of my condition and i also dont put on short skirts so i can hide my legs. Going out has become a nightmare , i feel so lonely even when around friends and family. Lately i have been crying my self to sleep everyday i just dont know how to deal with my emotions . Since this is a life time condition i really cannot go on like this i am trying so hard to figh this feeling but i am just not winning.
I am so scared to love again , i am not ready to give my already shattered heart away. I really to feel terrible right now, i feel lonely, sad, empty i just do not know what to hold onto and am not really passionate about my second course but i had to do it because of my condition.
I am failing to live positively with chronic pain. I have re-told my story so many times. I need some encouragement.
Thank you.
I am not saying it is easy to live with a chronic condition when you are old, but it is so much difficult when you are young. I have lived with this condition since i was 16 years today i am 29 years. The condition was not as bad in my teens but it still shattered my self esteem then, but now it has affected me even more because it is progressive. I feel like part of me has died or to be honest i just feel like i died sometime ago and contiunue to exist . I have such a deep seated sadness from within and i feel so empty and lonely.
It is because of this condition my boyfriend broke up with me four years ago and i have never dated ever since then, it also affeted my career life as i had to give up my job as a Chemist because my feet could no longer carry me. I then had to go and pursue my second degree in Information technology that i completed last year to get me a job that requires me to sit.I am glad i am done and now looking for a job but part of me is sad because i am not really passionate about my second degree.
Right now i just feel like life has come to a stand still. I am so so sad most of the times and i cant seem to shake of the feeling.
Right now at the age of 29 i feel like i have nothing to hold onto, all mys sisters are married with kids and most of my friends are either in a stable relationship or married. They also have houses and cars ( not really a big deal because one day i will also buy those). But the relationship part is the saddest part.
I feel like nothing is going right at the moment , i am so depressed right now. It seems my whole life just revolves around lympedema. When we go out people my age are addressed up , but as for me it is hard to find the right size of shoes because of my condition and i also dont put on short skirts so i can hide my legs. Going out has become a nightmare , i feel so lonely even when around friends and family. Lately i have been crying my self to sleep everyday i just dont know how to deal with my emotions . Since this is a life time condition i really cannot go on like this i am trying so hard to figh this feeling but i am just not winning.
I am so scared to love again , i am not ready to give my already shattered heart away. I really to feel terrible right now, i feel lonely, sad, empty i just do not know what to hold onto and am not really passionate about my second course but i had to do it because of my condition.
I am failing to live positively with chronic pain. I have re-told my story so many times. I need some encouragement.
Thank you.
I have had my ups and downs with chronic illness. I've been sick for a long time. I've tried lots of different things over the years. I am sorry that this has happened to you, I'm sorry for all you have been through. I had to find ways to accept my conditions and to find ways to be myself....the conditions are what I have, not who I am. I had to let go of a lot of stuff that was hurting me. The everybody else has a mate, has what I want, I feel so isolated, why me, all of it. All those thoughts were killing my spirit. Deep down I wanted to feel better, have a life with hope. I had to let go of thoughts, let go of emotions and recalibrate. I was so mean to me, I was so angry at others. I had no room left for joy. I started to read about others with adversity, learning how they handled things. I started by gifting myself a new beginning. I decided to accept myself exactly the way I am and to treat myself with respect, gentle care, tact and concern. I decided to look at what I can do, what I get to do and let go of everything else. It has taken me practice to live these new thoughts, but each day I feel better and better. I was so low, that I was giving up...giving up was the worst kind of pain...more than the illnesses, more than the loss of abilities, things and people. Deep down I wanted to live and knew that would take some self-love, a change in my thinking.
The impact of illness is hard at any age, hard on our loved ones, hard on us. I got sick when my youngest child was ten and that was very hard for her...there were so many things I could no longer do with her, I was sick and tired or tired and sick. I had been single for a long time and married again. He left me in the second year of our marriage, the first year I was ill. It was too much reality for him and he walked out the door.
I'm not sharing this to hurt or scare you...he was the one lacking in character, devotion and love. If he had been ill, I would have helped him, been supportive of him. He was not right for me, so even though it hurt like almighty hades, it was best for me. I went to a therapist who helped me find ways to cope with chronic illness and was doing better, when I had another illness hit. This time I had to stop working forever. I fell apart, curled up in a ball for 3 months and then I started to emerge again, wobbly, scared, but wanting more for myself. I've been working on "recalibrating" ever since. I know this is hard, I know you have bad days...I also know that you have a bright and able intellect, you are precious and you can have more in your life...right now I am working on me, treating myself well as I sort out how to live at home full-time, work out the logistics, the finances, and spend time each day feeling joy....feeling peace...the more I let go of, the more room I have for what I want and need...sending you hugs and care!
Thanks for sharing your story with me, i have learnt alot from reading this. I am sorry for what happened in your life but then again i salute you for your bravery, You were brave to love again although the relationship did not work out at least you tried again , but if he was not willing to be there for you it is good he walked out , you will learn to be on your own again.
I think with me it is just that i never really mourned , right now i am giving my self time to mourn , wont rush through my emotions and tell my self that i am fine when i am not. From mourning i will step up and shake it off, i will find joy again. First from within me, try to love my self again and shake off some anger. It is not good to live like this , it is totally draining. I thank God that with lympedema that the pain is mild some days ,that it does not disturb one much, but i find my self that those days , the emotional pain is enormous. In fact the emotional pain with my condition is the biggest enemy.
Thank you for sharing your story. You are one brave woman and you insipire me. There is bravery in each of us we just have to find it and that is exactly what i am going to do. I think i have focused on my condition way too long thus it is the only thing that i see.
HUGS.