Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I chose to forgive my partner for sexting another woman, this was back in April of this year.
I was doing well and had not thought about this issue for a while and was moving on with it all then suddenly for around a month or so,
he no longer wants to make love, always an excuse:, tired, ill, busy etc. I get that, we all get tired, ill and so on but it just seems to be all the time with him now.
Says he wants to and makes all the flirty chat with me then doesn't follow up.
He didn't make love to me on my birthday, I tried initiating and got brushed of, I guess that's when I thought something could be wrong, it was like he preferred to be working on a project we are both doing.
Should I be worried ?
I was doing well and had not thought about this issue for a while and was moving on with it all then suddenly for around a month or so,
he no longer wants to make love, always an excuse:, tired, ill, busy etc. I get that, we all get tired, ill and so on but it just seems to be all the time with him now.
Says he wants to and makes all the flirty chat with me then doesn't follow up.
He didn't make love to me on my birthday, I tried initiating and got brushed of, I guess that's when I thought something could be wrong, it was like he preferred to be working on a project we are both doing.
Should I be worried ?
If there are physical reasons, it can take some men quite awhile to get help because they are embarrassed.
I would say to keep your eyes open, believe actions more than words at this point, as he's been less than honest in the past. While it is possible that there is something just going on with him, not involving another person or cheating I mean, due to all you went through back then, I'd be suspicious. Something has seemed off about his stories from the beginning. He should be able to give you full transparency to this day, due to the sexting in the past incident, and I would definitely be looking into the phone records, email records, etc.
Sorry to hear you're still dealing with this.
((HUGS))
Regarding the sexting back in April, I'll bet my knickers he was having sex with her, especially since the OW's husband flipped out on him in public. There's a good chance he's gone underground with his affair, as sexting is something people do who are either about to have sex with that person, or are already doing so.
It's extremely difficult for a loyal spouse (LS) to come to terms with admitting that their spouse/partner is lying to them, cheating on them, and being intimate with someone else. It's the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I think the lack of interest in having sex with you is a sign that he's being intimate with someone else. Only you can decide what you will and will not tolerate, but you have come to a board for infidelity, where most who comment here, have been a victim of infidelity, and have experienced much of what you write.
I wish you well.
Does anyone now if I can check his location remotely ???
He works a lot of night shifts, would be interested to see if he his actually at work!!
happymamma2j : I agree, that is why I am suspicious, he was not open and honest with me (still isn't about what happened). When her husband flipped out I felt terrible and worried for my partners safety tbh, I also remember feeling it was way over the top . I, of course started all the questioning again and he didn't like it at all, wants me to drop it and forget about it , he says he is embarrassed and ashamed that he did this. Annoyingly I can not access his phone records with his provider as he is not signed up to a certain plan that allows that (I have tried) . His emails seem perfectly legit, I get to look at them from time to time ....but he is very good at deleting everything !
shoretimenow : I didn't even think about physical reasons, beyond tiredness ..I guess if this continues I will convince him to see the doc, if there is a more sinister reason as in having sex with someone else then he won't be so keen to have medical intervention !!
Leonoire: I did smile at you betting your knickers ! Quite possibly he is having sex with someone else, I am on alert to the possibility, I wouldn't be too surprised NOW with his past behaviour . ...
I have also noticed him being a bit more critical of me lately too RED FLAG.....I pulled him up on it and he immediately said he was sorry, and was as nice as pie, back to his usual self.
I sadly remember an incident (before I got told about his sexting) where we were with this woman he sext and her husband and he was really quite obnoxious to me .......we were playing a game of charades and he really hated the fact that I was winning and much better at the game than him, so he acted quite nasty to me, I remember being a feeling upset at the time ..........but actually it all made sense not long after as to why he was being nasty, he was showing off to her, and putting me down at the same time ...urgh .
sex is one birthday present men like to give
He may be cheating he may not be. The most important thing I can tell you is to communicate. Be open and honest He and you deserve that much. If the love and trust are gone move on if there is a reson for his lack of affection work it out. Good luck and god bless I wish you the best.
Hurt Husband.
I have found that while it has been close to 2 years since we have been sexually intimate, our communication has been so much better, our relationship is a lot stronger, and we are in a lot happier place than we were when she cheated.