What ever if financially best for you....
There isn't any chance of reconciliation? Are you working on it?
If not ... If you own the other house sell it split the profit. Both of you downsize. Breaking up sucks ... your kids should be going to your house.
It is great that you two are making it work with the kids... but for you .. you need stability. Hotels are not stabile.

Yes we own the house, and to be honest it just breaks my heart to have my kids move out of the house they grew up in. They come to my apartment but since school started there bus is near the house so it's easier.
As for getting back, sometimes I do but sometimes I don't because the trust is broken. I keep asking myself were there others. Honestly I don't want to know if there were I won't be able to Handel it. It took me a while and with the help of a shrink cause I went into a depression stage for a while.
Financial I should move and just stay in hotels for a while since my lease is up.
I will just let her keep house but not remove my name because of the kids.

If she is cheating on you, why don't you tell her to leave and keep the kids and you in the house?
Talk to an attorney..

That's a good point, my dilemma, when I found out my goal was to load a uhaul while she was with him and text both of them the truck is on the way down. She has family that bought the house across the street and you know family sticks together. Also for the benefit of my kids they are innocent I don't want them to not see there cousins and family.

If your question is STRICTLY financial, then obviously you should just use a hotel. But rarely are these hard considerations strictly financial. I must say that I TOTALLY understand that you want your kids to remain where they are. Can you move back into the house and she moves across the street with her family? Who pays the mortgage on the house? Have you consulted an attorney yet? You "abandoning" the marital home could pose a real problem for you in the event you head down the path to divorce. Honestly, if at all possible, I think you should move back into the house, and let her figure out what to do with herself.

I would move back in and tell her to move out to her family's house or her affair partner.

It doesn't make sense to me that you are the one who has to leave. Plus if you are taking care of the kids more often then logistically it even make sense for her to be out of the house.

I am going through a similiar thing. My husband cheated and travels for work and I gave up my career to help his business and stay ar home to care for our daughter but he is refusing to move out. I am not sure what to do either.

You are giving your CS exactly what she wants and the power to walk over you even more.

Agree with forward motion and mr.cellophane. Listen to them.
Talk to an attorney.

I know you have the best intentions right now and don't know which way is up- but you really handling this wrong.
Just know, my kids cousins, live 45 minutes away from us- they keep in touch.

I appreciate all the info, I really do. I always say I'm a ass. I gave up so much for her to pursue her career. I'm not saying I was a angel but that's one thing I was always faithful. I would always put my family ahead if myself. I know it's not right but it's hard to break that.
Especially when married for 20 years. I think my next step is to go to dinner with her on Friday and explain I want her out of house.
I really tried to expect the fact what she done, but I know it will always be at back of my mind. Thank you all...

Whatever personal flaws you are mentioning it may be a good idea to work on this since you need to be a good example to your kids.

I'm glad you are trying to lead your household again even if it is in the absence of your wife. Your kids will one day see that despite the betrayal of their mother you kept the household intact and tried to better yourself instead of running away or playing the victim.

Thank you forward motion, I must. Had to laugh today she went to work at 5am home by 130, I wake up at 530 get kids stuff together for school wake them at 615 they shower I make breakfast and drop them off to school. Go food shopping for the house even though i don't live there but it's for my kids. I go to work stop by after work at 530 and she says kids are at bowling alley, ARE YOU GONNA GET THEM. I laugh and just walk out, go get kids mind you I'm exhausted, while I'm getting them she calls our son tell dad to pick up some dinner. Mind you I just went shopping.
I really can't wait till Friday to tell her to get out, I may even have her stuff put in a uhaul and driven to the guys house she had a affair with and leave him a message hope you have room. Cause he won't answer my calls. O boy, I know I'm a ass, for doing things but I just get concerned and wonder are kids eating.

I get a lot of passive aggressive vibe from you. I get it though, they are both cops and obviously that puts you in a difficult position as you are angry and want justice.

In the end the type of characters they are will lead them to self destruction one way or another. You don't need to bring justice to them, they will get it.

The u-haul thing isn't really necessary or beneficial to anyone including you or the kids. Just stop enabling her and move back in and wait for the divorce paperwork to go through.

Petty attacks just show how much you care about her, cold indifference indicates you've moved on.

Forwrdmotion, thank you for your feed back. I don't think it's passive aggression but more tired of the situation and would rather keep shut right now until Friday, so my kids don't see a fight. She will do things like that just to egg me on, but Latley I won't give in and just walk away.
As for Uhaul maybe I should not but I figured I will give her a parting gift and have het stuff packed.
But I do appreciate the feedback..

You better talk to an atty first before you do anything. You can legally and quietly move back into the house until there is a legal agreement in place about the house.