The mission statement on this page that some of you on mobile devices are not seeing says regarding the Infidelity Support Group: Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after the transgression.
Please understand those of you cheaters who are posting here about your dilemma of having to choose between your spouse and your affair partner, those of you who go into great detail about your many many needs and wants, blame the faithful partner for somehow not being enough, say things like "everyone is doing it, people have cheated forever, monogamy isn't natural, my partner needs to shoulder some of the responsibility for my affair” etc, have all the excuses under the sun to justify it all away, engage in blame shifting and gas lighting:
1. Many betrayed spouses here are currently experiencing trauma from having discovered (whether yesterday, a week ago, a month ago, a year ago etc) that they have been deceived, discarded and abused by the very person who claimed to love them exclusively. One consequence is that you are re-traumatizing and triggering many betrayed here when you do this. Life as we knew it has ended.
2. The sad sausage routine doesn't get much sympathy here. Because your actions have consequences. Active cheaters will hear the truth from us betrayed and you will probably not like it. There is a huge difference between regret and remorse.
3. These types of posts are more in line with Cheaters Anonymous here on DS. Try it out there if you are looking for an audience. The Infidelity Support group is not a place to discuss how one might pull off being unfaithful, look for sympathy, or get a green light for this type of behavior.
4. None of the above applies to the former cheaters who are in recovery and post here with empathy and understanding towards the betrayed.
(A version of this ran previously. Seems like this needs to be trotted out every few months or so)
Hello. The tittle is probablly confusing but here is what i mean. My boyfriend and i have been dating for 2 years and we love eachother. There havent been any problems in our relationship so far. The only problem is with me. I have had many mental issues when we met which i told him at that time. Our first year was rough when it came to sex. I couldnt feel anything or extreme pain due to stress....
After 15 years together and 13 married with two children involved, I found out my husband had an affair and even after that kept looking for a side piece. I am at a total loss. I gave everything to my marriage and kids. I have lost my sense of self. I have been crying non-stop but at the same time still thinking of catering to him. I'm pissed but after 15 years I need to start putting me first...