Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I've been reading so many posts all over the site that are justifying cheating.
1) It would only hurt my partner if they found out, I'm protecting them
2) I really want my relationship to work out, and if my partner finds out it will ruin it.
3) It was not a big deal, but my partner will overreact.
4) I can't leave my relationship right now, but will tell my partner when it's time.
Am I the only person that thinks this is bullshit? If you want to have PAs, EAs, cyber sex, phone sex, whatever the hell you want to have, then you have every right to do it. Live your life. Make yourself happy.
That DOES NOT automatically give you the right to decide what is best for your partner. Maybe you should allow them to make their own decisions about whether they really want to be in the relationship? You don't want to hurt them with knowledge, but that "protectiveness" doesn't spill over enough for you to not cheat? Bullshit. If your unfaithfulness was "not a big deal", why was it worth the cost of betrayal in your relationship?
Why can't the Cheaters just acknowledge that A) I'm doing it because I want to, B) satisfying my own needs for sex/attention/drama is more important than the damage I'm causing to my relationship, and C) I'm really keeping it a secret because I don't want to be accountable for what I've done.
Maybe I just need more coffee this morning.
1) It would only hurt my partner if they found out, I'm protecting them
2) I really want my relationship to work out, and if my partner finds out it will ruin it.
3) It was not a big deal, but my partner will overreact.
4) I can't leave my relationship right now, but will tell my partner when it's time.
Am I the only person that thinks this is bullshit? If you want to have PAs, EAs, cyber sex, phone sex, whatever the hell you want to have, then you have every right to do it. Live your life. Make yourself happy.
That DOES NOT automatically give you the right to decide what is best for your partner. Maybe you should allow them to make their own decisions about whether they really want to be in the relationship? You don't want to hurt them with knowledge, but that "protectiveness" doesn't spill over enough for you to not cheat? Bullshit. If your unfaithfulness was "not a big deal", why was it worth the cost of betrayal in your relationship?
Why can't the Cheaters just acknowledge that A) I'm doing it because I want to, B) satisfying my own needs for sex/attention/drama is more important than the damage I'm causing to my relationship, and C) I'm really keeping it a secret because I don't want to be accountable for what I've done.
Maybe I just need more coffee this morning.
A CS will start looking for more honest and effective ways of coping with the underlying shame only after discovering it in the first place. It is logical, after all, that one does not attempt to resolve a problem until they've accurately identified it.
There is no good reason to keep such secrets. I believe it is the shame that does it and wanting to remain in the relationship. Telling would risk that. So it's also a selfish decision. Certainly not to avoid hurt feelings. If they gave a shit about that, they wouldn't have screwed around to begin with.
Just dont know how my ex wife thought these were acceptable .