You have every right to feel hurt and sad. What he did was unacceptable.
However to help yourself heal it might help to do some individual counseling. The time probably has long passed for him to accept his portion of responsibility. But I am sure you can find healing and the ability to move on.

thank you for that... I did find counselling helpful... my counsellor actually moved away and I just didn't have it in me to start over... guess I should really get back at trying to heal...funny how I think I should just be better by now...

I caught my H cheating five years ago. I still think about his A every single day.

These cheaters and their heinous actions have a devastating impact on us. A counselor could help you. For me understanding the cheating mind helps. In the last couple of weeks the chump lady has had some posts that pretty clearly spell it all out. Try reading what she has to say. It might help you.

If you haven't already try meditation, prayer . . . you need something or someone to fill that hole in your heart. Make a goal for your life and then a plan on how you are going to achieve that goal.

BTW you have no idea how your ex and the ow are doing. You only know what they want you to know!

I am with Storm... What we put on Facebook is a lot different then what happens under our roof... Nobody on Facebook news about my husbands A. They see us ridiculously happy up until a year and a half ago so did I.
She will be just as shocked when he cheats on her.

I hope you haven't turned your back on all men. I hope someday you will find peace... Because this can ruin ruin any other relationship you have.

I appreciate your replies! and the reminder that I have no clue what their relationship is truly like... it's ridiculous how I drive myself crazy wondering what she has that I don't... why he's happier now than he was with me...what I could have done differently?! ... ugh!

I am pretty sure that she does not have anything you don't. I am pretty sure that he is looking at her through rose-colored glasses and only seeing what she wants him to see. He does not know her really. And because of that he may be in for a big surprise. People are not always what they seem.
This is more about him than it is about you.

I might add, that even though they have been together a while, like another person said, you don't really know any more about how happy he really is than they want you to know. He might very well feel obligated to stay with her out of guilt, manipulation, etc. You just don't know...

My husband left me 9 months ago for another woman. I wake up every morning and I can still fell him by my side. I waited for him for over 2 years to get out of Prison. I loved him he made a mistake and I stuck by him 100% only to have him come out and 4 months afterward discover he didn't love me anymore. He completely abandoned me.
Thanks to our wonderful technology I get to see him on Facebook saying how amazing his relationship is. Its horrible. I am getting better but it still hurts.

If you block him on Facebook, you can spare yourself from the hurts of seeing what he is posting.

thats so wrong and hurtful what he did...I can totally understand how you feel and you have every right to feel that way....abandoned and discarded and blaming yourself, but dont, is not your fault and was his horrible decision.
have you tried finding a new relationship? am not suggesting you jump into one but it might help erase some of the old memories or lessen their relevance in your life....for now focus on you, make yourself better in any way you can and support your kids, they are the most important thing