You are a far better woman than I.

I'd be getting out as fast as I could.

It seems to me that you are going to have a marriage with a whole lot of people in it and this is how it is going to be for a long, long time.

Not my cup of tea.

Having a child with another woman would be a dealbreaker for me. You will have a lifetime of sh%t sandwiches to choke down as you watch him and that child for the rest of your life. I would insist on DNA testing when the baby is born if you really are willing to stand by and let your husband co-parent with another woman. The thing that needs to be fixed in your relationship...the cheating. Difficult marriages or difficult life experiences do not cause cheating.

I would go with them... I don’t care what he says .. he had enough feelings to put a baby in her. Do not let them alone to stir them up.
I really feel that he can be a part of the kids life without “sharing” these precious special tender moments with her. He is your husband. Not hers. He is that kids father. That is it. They are playing house while you sit at home. He will be holdinger her hand waiting for the ultrasound. Don’t do it!
Personally, I would walk in holding my husbands hand. If she doesn’t like that I am there then he doesn’t get to be either. We are a package deal.

She swears the baby is his, but she has also asked him “what if it’s not yours?” And mentioned that all the stress could cause her to miscarry. Yes I rolled my eyes at this one too. A lot of his reason for going is to actually have proof hat she is even pregnant or if she’s lying.

Don’t let him go by himself

The whole situation is messed up. She is legally married, but was dating someone else at this time. So there is the possibility that this is her "boyfriends" baby. My husband swears that he never finished inside of her (and yes I know its possible to get pregnant still but the odds seem to be lower). She quit work the day that he told me everything. He has been nothing but honest and shown/told me everything I have asked for since then. He has spoken/texted with her but only while I have been in the room. He deleted all of his social media accounts (Facebook, snapchat, etc.). I'm not trying to sound like I'm making any excuses for anything> I just need to get it all out and vent to people outside of the picture. She has since twisted everything around to make it seem like she is the victim. She think he has gotten away with out any consequences because he gets to keep his job and family while she is suffering with no job, being pregnant and potentially losing her other children because their fathers will be terrible to her. She actually had the nerve to tell him that he is not taking responsibility for anything and needs to step up like he is supposed to - which translates to me that she will be unhappy unless he leaves me like he told her he would.

I want to understand why people that cheat don’t use condoms???? It shows a total lack of respect to the spouse/ partner! Beside cheating, this puts the others life potentially at risk! HIV, HepC, HPV ... it astounds me!

This is going to be very difficult for you. If the kid is his or not. Her only goal now is to get him to leave you so they can be a happy family.
How dare he actually love his wife and want to stay. She can’t wrap her head around that!

He should not go with her anywhere alone!

It actually makes sense that cheaters don't use condoms.

People who are unwise make decisions no passion and emotional rather than their minds, conscience, and logic.

It follows the same thinking pattern of having affairs in the first place to not think about consequences of sex, spending etc.

From the sounds of it I doubt the kid is your husband's.

Personally I wouldn't stay with my wife if my kid wasn't mine. I asked for a paternity test and he is mine, otherwise I wouldn't waste my resources and time on her or her AP's child.

Aside from that it is too messy a situation and I wouldn't want any part of that.

In your position I would await a paternity test before deciding to take him back or not.

Thank you for your responses. I’m still waiting for someone to wake me up from this nightmare. Today is her appointment. We’ve decided that he needs to go to see it for himself and make sure she’s not just lying. The crazy part is that I’m not even sick over this child as much anymore. It’s the appointment itself. It’s knowing he will be alone in such an emotional setting. I even asked if the boyfriend will be there too since nothing is 100% confirmed to be his yet.

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