Infidelity Support Group

Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...

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wrongedx2 10/24/2016

I recently found out my significant other cheated on me. We were up at our cabin with our children and had an amazing day together. We then went to a bowling alley and the kids bowled while we watched some of the cubs game. It was getting late and I said we needed to leave. I went to our cabin with our kids and my so stayed out watching the game. It came to be 2 am and he wasn't home. I waited a little bit and finally tried calling at 3 am, no answer. At 345 I texted him to find out what was going on and once again no response. I then got a text at 415 that he had fallen asleep in his truck at the bar and would be home soon. He got home at 430 and showered. Right away I knew he did something. I find the voicemail from the lady he messed around with. I feel like our relationship is now based on so many lies. I feel used, unappreciated, and quite frankly like a doormat.

Darrellk91 10/25/2016

I understand what you feel. He needsaid to be honest with you now about what happened and why he did it. If he can't then you need to decide if he will ever be honest with you. The doormat feeling is like what I feel also. It makes you feel like you've been taken for a fool and it hurts so much. Another important thing for you to do is also very honest with him about how you feel about it. Let it all out so he knows what he has done to you. Keep talking to people. Maybe a close friend who will just listen to what you have to say. I made the mistake of talking to too many people and got too many opinions from other all trying to tell me what I should do. But they all weren't feeling what I felt. Just do what feels right for you right now and the rest will follow

happymama2j 10/25/2016

I'm sorry you are going through this. I faced a similar scenario when I discovered proof of my now-EX-husband's affairs. Even reading your story brought back that "sick-in-the-pit-of-my-stomach" feeling, even though it has been nearly 3 years ago now. Have you told him that you know?

wrongedx2 10/25/2016

Yes, he knows I know. I asked to see his phone and listened to the deleted voicemail message of the woman giving him directions to her house. I feel like he feels like we should just move past this and not dwell on it. I feel like our life is all a lie and wonder if we ever had an emotional connection or love

Lenoire 10/25/2016

I too am sorry to read of your situation, and felt that sick feeling after reading your story. If he is claiming that he wants to bury it, you can be certain there's a whole lot more to the story than you're getting. Cheaters lie and only admit to what they've been caught with. The, I-fell-asleep-in-the-truck excuse, has got to be the oldest lie in the cheaters handbook. In my case, it took about two weeks of long discussions and fights before I got more of the truth, and it devastated me. That's why they don't tell all when caught, because they know that if you knew all, you would kick them out.

Asking you to forget about it is telltale that he feels entitled to do what he's doing, and does not respect you or your wishes. It can also signify that he's been doing it for awhile, since he was so effin bold to skip out once you'd gone with the kids, and think you'd believe the old fell-asleep-in-the-truck-at-the-bar bullshit story, then come home at 4:30 a.m. and shower? Give me a break!

If you let this go, you're courting grief, as he will just recommit once the coast is clear, without being accountable for his infidelity, his lies and deceit, and any repercussions going forward.

How did he meet this lady? Is he on a sex chatting platform, and if so, how long has he been on? If he has been, ask for the passwords so you can go to his profile and see for yourself when he opened the account, as well as all his other activities and pick-ups. Cheaters lie, and will continue to do so until you press for the truth. Now is your chance to get to the bottom of this and to strike while the iron is hot.

I wish you well.

betrayedtodeath 10/25/2016

I'm so sorry you're here and this is happening to you! Listen to Lenoire...it's good advice.

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