Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
Okay guys, I know i have been quiet on the board lately and just reading and throwing my support in here and there.
My husband is currently in Tennessee for an extended stay as we take a break from each other. We are working on ourselves and I have asked him not to return back to our marital home until he is ready to move on with our marriage and start fresh, or he is ready to go our separate ways.
Currently it seems I am in this phase where I want to instigate fights or am emotional with him. I am on anti depressants, and my doctor uped my dose to 30mg, but I don't know if this was the right move. I am seeing a new counselor tomorrow to work more on me being content with myself and I have a doctor's appointment next week to see about her reccomendation about getting off of the anti depressants and perhaps exercising more to get those feel good endorphins.
Anyway, my husband and I will be spending valentines day apart, and usually we don't do much for this day, but this is our first one since the affair. I bought him Game of thrones Season 2, and am having it mailed to his mom's house with just a note about how I hope he enjoys the second season and I am thinking of him. Love Always, Rebecca.... anyway, he won't get that until the 19th. So I don't know what kind of card to send him.
I had a card about us starting over, with a fresh start, and it was sweet. but now that he seems upset that I am having too much expectations and treating him like a husband, and wants to first establish treating eachother well as friends, I don't know if that would be the best idea.
Maybe I should just get him a funny card to take the pressure off. Basically its like going back to the basics, it seems, and its kind of leaving me confused about the whole thing really.
He got me a tanzanite/diamond ring with a matching necklace, its significant because when we were dating he got me a tanzanite promise ring- this was like 12 years ago- but it was sweet.
Hope this makes sense to someone lol
My husband is currently in Tennessee for an extended stay as we take a break from each other. We are working on ourselves and I have asked him not to return back to our marital home until he is ready to move on with our marriage and start fresh, or he is ready to go our separate ways.
Currently it seems I am in this phase where I want to instigate fights or am emotional with him. I am on anti depressants, and my doctor uped my dose to 30mg, but I don't know if this was the right move. I am seeing a new counselor tomorrow to work more on me being content with myself and I have a doctor's appointment next week to see about her reccomendation about getting off of the anti depressants and perhaps exercising more to get those feel good endorphins.
Anyway, my husband and I will be spending valentines day apart, and usually we don't do much for this day, but this is our first one since the affair. I bought him Game of thrones Season 2, and am having it mailed to his mom's house with just a note about how I hope he enjoys the second season and I am thinking of him. Love Always, Rebecca.... anyway, he won't get that until the 19th. So I don't know what kind of card to send him.
I had a card about us starting over, with a fresh start, and it was sweet. but now that he seems upset that I am having too much expectations and treating him like a husband, and wants to first establish treating eachother well as friends, I don't know if that would be the best idea.
Maybe I should just get him a funny card to take the pressure off. Basically its like going back to the basics, it seems, and its kind of leaving me confused about the whole thing really.
He got me a tanzanite/diamond ring with a matching necklace, its significant because when we were dating he got me a tanzanite promise ring- this was like 12 years ago- but it was sweet.
Hope this makes sense to someone lol
There is the whole stupid challenge aspect to this - right now if your not together - then he shouldn't be getting anything from you.
You want him to have "you" on his mind? well sending him a card is not going to do that - he will know that you've been thinking about him.
He has to be thinking about "you" - in order to do that - he has to wonder - what the heck are "you" are doing?...
The whole thing is just plan stupid - it's the game of the game - I used to do this when I was in highschool - and I have read - why do we need to do this when we get older? life is short etc.
Well - you are in this situation and your H is not respecting you - earn it back - not by sending a card.
thats my advice.
I think he needs to respect you - I think in marriage and anything in life respect is earned - marriage is a give and take - not a one way street - you were very nice to have sent him the one gift.
I think the card is showing him to much of your "cards" what you are thinking - he has to wonder that - give him that "gift" - the I wonder what the heck "she/you" is/are doing on valentines day "gift" - perhaps she is with another guy and has replaced my sorry butt "gift".
What happened to the, "This isn't a happy anniversary, but I'm still here and willing to try" card?
What happened to the, "My condolences for your lack of self esteem and character that lead you to have an affair with a married man/woman" card?
I could go on and on.
Rebecca, I am sorry to hear you will be apart for Valentine's Day, but who knows what revelations may come? Only time will tell.
Whether you send him a card or not, I would recommend pampering yourself on Valentine's Day and treating yourself the way you'd want to be treated. A nice hot bath? A delicious home cooked meal? Time in front of the TV with your favorite movie? Whatever you do, I hope you find some pleasure in the day.
I live in San Antonio and the Rodeo starts this weekend, I've never been but I know they have some country music concerts- like Eli Young Band or Lady A for $12 a ticket.
I plan on doing a girlie movie and then going home to get into a dog sandwich-- lol-- thats when I have a dog on either side of me where I cannot move, but its cozy..
I just finished getting a manicure and pedicure. I have been checking out things to do in my area. I just found out that there is a megabus here so I can go to Houston, or Dallas, or El Paso for a day trip to a museum or something. I am enjoying the self reflection time to be honest, and my house is staying pretty clean ;)
That is actually what will occur in your thinking - it will slowly change from what can I do for him mentality - to honestly in your lens - it will be - what can someone do for me... what can H do for me - that shift will happen and when you feel it - he will also feel it - when you don't want him to call you anymore - is when he will start calling you. You have to have that patience and know your self worth.
I would choose to let them think about u and not the other way around.
I think we all could come up with some pretty priceless Valentines day cards with quite the laugh involved ;)
Relationships are for two people.... some bitches just can't count.
Happy valentines day to my STBX, hope all is well with your bitch...
Maybe a little too harsh?