I am wondering the same thing. At this point its just self defense. Your H hurt you in the deepest way possible, so now the shield is back up to protect yourself. It seems that every one takes a different amount of time to move past that some people continue to have a normal intimate life while others may take months or years. I am fearing the same thing as I havent seen H for so long, yet when I go to see him in a week we are staying in the same hotel room (I specified 2 beds!). I even explained to him the moment of finding each other again is completely destroyed for me. I dont want him to hug me, I dont want him to kiss me, and certainly the idea of anything else after that makes me sick to my stomach. I have told him about this and he is understanding and he just keeps apologizing, but the damage has already been done. At some point the wall has to come back down or you cant heal the marriage.

We went through the "hysterical bonding" phase for 9 months! Sex at least twice a day, every day! I guess, subconsciously, I wanted to prove that I was better than the OM and reconnect to save my marriage.
I took responsibility for my share of the breakdown in our intimacy. I was hyper-aware of doing whatever was needed to reestablish that intimacy and being "husband of the year"! At least if things didn't work out, I would know that I gave it my all.
I also spent the past 3 years working on me (as much as our marriage) so that I could be a better person.
Oh, and lastly, she had to get a STD test, with me there, to make sure the gyno knew what I wanted done and why.

No.
Regardless of what some people say, the answer is and always will be NO!
You will find there will always be triggers. Smells, sounds, TV ads.
One thing that kills me is when she told me... ready for this?
It's not like we had sex, he wore a condom. WTF??? So that means if I have revenge sex with a condom, it really was not sex.... right?
So, every time I see a Trojan ad or commercial, I relive that moment.
My therapist flat out told me the things she did will never go away. I need to choose to accept it or move on. Right now I am stuck in the middle and I am deciding which way I need to go. There are days where I want to go left, but there are more days where I want to go right.
I feel the hurt you are going thru. We all do. I wish you well in this journey, and do remember, we are here for each other. It really does help to talk and get some of this off of your mind, even for a few minutes.

I no longer feel repulsed. I too had hysterical bonding then regressed and went through hatred anger and yes, repulsion.

I think it fades for the most part. I'm pretty sure that there will always be triggers for pain. Since I found out right after Christmas, it's always a bit touchy. Valentines Day is better than it was, but, I always remember. I think as someone suggested that we have to accept that there will always be reminders. And, each time there is one, we have to choose to go on once again.

After reading your comments...maybe something's wrong with me....
Her and I were intimate the same day I found out. Though, it wasn't a "lovely, kissing, holding" type of thing....more like a venting for me. I was pissed off, hurt, and I needed to just F something. It's been like that ever since. Before we used to snug afterwards, say "I love you"...but now I just want to shower and find another room to be in as soon as it's over. She doesn't say anything about how it's changed. I figured that it's just temp and I'll warm up eventually, but I' still cold. My other option is to cheat...and I just can't do it.