Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
To make long story short I have been in a sexless marriage for 12 years due to husband having ED. Well until, he met a 23 year old heroine addict/lesbian last year. He confessed to the affair because she ended up pregnant. I forgave him he tested for std's and saids the baby more than likely isn't his. She has been in jail since May for domestic violence with her girlfriend. Now he came home for a week but the ED is still there with me. I asked him if he took anything have sex with the OW and he said sometimes. I asked what is wrong with me and he said nothing but can not explain why it worked before. Can anyone give me their opinion? I think he isn't in love with me as he saids he is or doesn't find me attractive any longer since I am 54 now. Thank you in advance
If he is open to trying to fix the problem, there is therapy, books you can read together, or sexual touching without intercourse.
I'm not trying to be facetious but just trying to understand if you love him or if it is more along the lines of codependency or a fear or being alone/abandoned.
It could be that you went through a terrible cancer and he spoon fed you and was by your side..etc
We have been through so much together, from being broke and surviving to him having to work like his does now and we live comfortable. He swares he loves me, and he will be retiring in 3 years. We just moved in 2015 where we are going to retire at.
I have been praying that I would get an answer on what to do. I really think I got that answer today.
If he refuses to meet all your conditions, then you need to decide what you want to do. You can stay and have more of the same or you can move on.
What is so awful about being 54 BTW? I assume he's no spring chicken himself. This has less to do with you and more to do with him and his issues. So stop blaming yourself for his problems. Stand up for yourself and make that list.
Most of the time ED is in their head.. like looking at porn ect.. it was dangerous and exciting to be with someone new. Not sure how adventurous you are or want to be.. start with medical doctor and viagra. Then he needs therapy ...
At your age I understand that you may not care to start over and just try to salvage whatever you can.
It also appears that his "love" for your is more for home stability and companionship.
Given the situation it may be a good idea to get a post nup before giving him another chance. As well, if the child is actually his a divorce would be a good idea even if you do decide to be with him to protect your half of the assets.
The marriage is now a business transaction. Companionship for financial security.
I've told him we do need a vacation just him and I and he agrees. He has to have surgery on his hands in December then maybe we can plan something after that.
We also are talking about renewing our vows and going forward. But I am still taking day by day. I pray every day the the Lord will show me the path that needs to be taken.
I talked to the father of my youngest child, (which is grown with a family of his own now.) I could always count on his honest opinion and he told me to pray on it, which I do everyday, and to take my time in the decision I make. He and his wife have been through so much also, and I told him I needed an honest opinion that knew me and the life I had lived in the past. He gave it to me which I am thankful he brought up prayer. So as of now we are going to go forward and pray the Lord will keep his hands on or marriage.