Infidelity Support Group

Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...

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2manyregrets 03/07/2020

Need advice. I had a emotional affair 10 1/2 years ago in where I didn't want a romantic or sexting relationship with the other female who was a old childhood friend. She came back into my life at a low point of my life and very low with my marriage which is absolutely no sorry *** reason for my emotional affair ... At that point I very much love my wife but was not loving her the way I should have;being distant,cold,rude and didn't always take her calls. I blamed her for a lot of issues due to our lack of communication and her not respectful of the issues that we worked out but I KNOW that is NOT a reason to have a affair and what I did was made it worse because I purposely was wanting her to find out by my sneaky demeanor almost like a child looking for attention but all I did was create so much hurt because once it came out then I had to face what I truly did then I became arrogant and selfish again by not owning it and putting it on my wife who did not deserve it . And in return my wife had a Revenge emotional affair which to this day he doesn't fully recognize it or knowledge it but the problem is she gets upset when I brought it up in the middle of her talking about my stuff and I'm stop doing it but unfortunately I've been telling her for quite some time that I have triggers and there are certain statements that she says that I did exactly what Carter are some of the same exact thing she did to me and if fortunately because she is suffering from the PTSD due to the emotional the fair now that has taken over so I've had to just left this is Harley go as far as her affair

Aronia 03/08/2020

All relationships have a moment when things go wrong. Most people I know admitted to having at the very least emotional affair. I apologize if it sounds insensitive, because it is - PTSD from emotional affair??? This is just stupid. There are so many real tragedies in the world and people somehow manage to pick up and move on. What you did is wrong but not uncommon. What she did is also not uncommon.
If you can’t work this out between the two of you, try mediation in counseling.

2manyregrets 03/09/2020

Yeah we have done years of therapy. The reality is that my wife is truly hurt but also her ego is hurt and she hasn't let it go. Me being a douche by dripping disclosure has not helped and prolonged everything as well..

Coffemaker 03/09/2020

Maybe you can try something else. Try going to a weekend marriage seminar called A Weekend to Remember. They hold it at different locations and spread over the country at many locations. Google it. It is faith based but their seminars are all about practical advice and you will learn eye opening truths and concepts about marriage and how to navigate difficulties. My wife and I as well as several friends attest to the help we got. I have friends who actually have separated and their marriage was restored. Another is called A Hope Restored. I know a couple who saw each other as the enemy but their marriage has been transformed and they are still happily married 11 years after attending the seminar. You are here because you are hurting and it is up to you and your wife if you want to give it a shot or just send it down the drain.

2manyregrets 03/09/2020

@coffemaker we have the luxury of living next to Seattle and only being a half hour away from dr. Gottman and going to a lot of his seminars and we've also went and seen Gary Chapman when he is come to Seattle and we have done some other Retreats so to speak and have done a lot of things and we're still going at it and my wife has recognized a lot of this has her own ego and the ability to just get over and get past what I did and not taking it so personally which is what she is doing and I have also got to do my part in recognizing that I didn't give her full disclosure and only dribbled fruits for a long time and so I've had to just be accountable and do my part but because I did damage by not giving her full disclosure and now it's going to take a tad bit longer to get over all this

Coffemaker 03/10/2020

Wow, you got access to great resources. As long both parties are willing to work on the relationship, any damage can be overcome. But you are right, sometimes it will take a long time and a lot of work and a lot of patience. As long as you start going the right direction, every little step will get you closer. If you are a praying person, start praying for her, yourself and your family. One day she will see your sincerity and commitment to her.

2manyregrets 03/10/2020

I truly appreciate your kind words and support in your hundred percent right praying is a huge factor in my life that I do do and sometimes you lose a little bit of your faith and when things don't go right but end of the day you have to believe in God and that things will work out whatever way it is meant to be but I can always control my own positive thinking and my own actions so that is something that I do need to keep doing

MemphisWH 03/10/2020

There is nothing wrong to ask God for the power to forgive yourself for your sins.
Even praying out loud with your wife admitting to your past sins and current sins, is greatly helpful.
God, you and her need to hear you admit to them and know you are not perfect, only GOD is. Knowing your sins and shame and dealing with them and getting your wife to know them and keep her in the
open will grow your marriage.
IF you have your shit together and are perfect why do you need her, that is so wrong for us to think like that.
You want her to grow and be better and she wants you to grow and be better why not do it together in the open, away from the lies.
Keep open and honest, your love will grow strong.

2manyregrets 03/10/2020

@MemphisWH I agree 100% with everything you just wrote and it's took a little while but it definitely got to wear it is today as you just typed and there is something free and open about just being honest about everything and letting it all out there and truly making in my case my life about my wife and recognizing what my ideal marriage was and what it is today and I truly understand and should understand just from being a Catholic that why you do marital therapy before getting married that way you can identify the difference in thinking and thoughts of what her idea of marriages and what my idea of marriages and raising kids and all these type of things and just having a spiritual spirits and not losing one's way is also important

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