One night in my 20s, I walked into a nightclub to see my boyfriend (at the time) with some woman. Well, they were sitting at the bar, kissing and going at it. I had no doubt that the next step was the bedroom. I was frozen for a moment, I mean, here I was, watching my boyfriend of three years, making out with another woman! Well, his friends were on the other side of the bar, frozen, too, waiting for a scene to erupt. I'm sure they were expecting me to go bananas and attack him or her -- or both. I had ordered a drink and was still standing, waiting for the bartender to make it, when Prince Charming and his lady came up for air. Well, he just sat there, eyes wide, not knowing what to do. So, I got creative. I simply waved -- like he was a casual acquainance. I got my drink and joined mygirlfriend near the dance floor. He was there in a matter of seconds, trying to explain how he didn't know I was coming out that night, yada, yada, yada. I told him that it was rude of him to leave his date like that and of course, he said she wasn't his date. So, I told him that I'd talk to him about it another time. And I stayed at the nightclub and danced the night away. In that one instant at the bar, I changed the game. I broke it off with him in the calmest, most ladylike manner I could muster and decided to be single for a while. It was the most liberating feeling I've ever experienced. I had the power for once in the relationship, and I made the most of it. He called, begged and pleaded with me for months to take him back, but I found a way to move on. And move on, I did. I took control and never looked back on that relationship as anything but a learning experience. It's been more than 20 years, and if I saw the guy today, I'd say, "thanks.'' That was just what I needed to take control of my life. Guys, let's stop wallowing in self-pity. Our significant others always have the power when we do that. Let's take our lives back in 2010 by taking control of ourselves. This is hard. It's scary, but I know for a fact that the best revenge in the world is success. Let's resolve to move forward and not be controlled by the past. Let's take better care of ourselves, rely on our real friends, and put ourselves first, for once. I heard a minister on the radio this morning who said that we should view 2010 like a car. The windshield is larger, because that's where you're headed, and therefore should be concentrated on fully. The rear-view mirror is smaller, and made for glancing. So, no, we'll never forget the hurt that we've experienced, but we can decide not to allow these events to continue to hold us hostage. So, let's not hate the SOs, or the OM or OW. Let's wish them well. And let's get on with controllling the only people we have the power to control -- OURSELVES. Happy New Year!!!