Infidelity Support Group

Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...

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All4meNow 12/16/2016

S after 12 1/2 years of marriage my husband just ups and leaves saying he wants a divorce. No our marriage wasnt perfect but I thought we at least were faithful to the other above all else. Back in Sept of this year my 35 yo husband left the kids home over night while I was working a night shift. The next morning I came home couldn't find my husband anywhere. Until I got a call from the Sheriffs dept telling me my husband had been arrested for dui (twice the legal limit) I did not find out until after his bail had been posted that he was with an 18 yo female at the time. I could literally kick myself now but I gave him another chance. Now earlier this week I found out he never stopped being with her and is still with her at this time.

I feel so stupid, I tried to be a good wife and mother but evidently that wasnt enough. I forgave so much throughout this marriage, from the emotional abuse, and physical abuse. I see things now that I had been blind to for years and I know there have been at least 3 other women other than this last one.

I guess I see more clearly now how things really were, I dont even recognize myself from the young woman I was before I was married. I changed so much about myself for him, my hair, the clothes I wear, all tge way down to the music I listened too.

How do I move on, How do I ever think about letting another person into my heart? I feel so broken that I'm not good enough for someone esle to love.

No_Trust 12/16/2016

I share your pain and I am sending you positive thoughts!

All4meNow 12/16/2016

thank you. Its truly sad how many people cheat. I hate it.

betrayedtodeath 12/16/2016

Please know that the cheating is not about you. It is about their sense of entitlement, the unilateral decision to step outside the marriage for his own needs without having the decency to let you in on his decision to cheat, to have a nice home life all while enjoying the benefits of APs. Please get yourself tested for STDs if you have not already done so. I'm really sorry you're here and you are going through this. I'm glad you are away from all the forms of abuse now. Time to get individual counseling and support for yourself so you can process what has happened and how to avoid relationships like this in the future. Hindsight is 20/20 and many of us mentally kick ourselves for not seeing the signs, allowing ourselves to be treated badly, etc. It is really hard to have trust in the aftermath of adultery. And yes, its incredibly sad how many people cheat. My mind is blown every single day when I contemplate the scope of this problem. I feel like honest, truthful, committed, people with integrity, values and impulse-control are in a very small minority these days. Please get tested for STDs right away!

All4meNow 12/16/2016

I'm an RN so the first thing i did was get tested, thank God I'm ok. was really scared for while. Hindsight is 20/20 I see a lot of things I never saw before. this.

gravinggirl 12/16/2016

After such a long and abusive relationship, you probably need therapy to process it and heal yourself. You can come out of this stronger and with healthy boundaries.

All4meNow 12/16/2016

It's on my list of to-do's. I need to get through this divorce without losing my mind and being there for my kids. But yes I know I need therapy

charger67 12/19/2016

its not you that's broken, its the cheater, lies, and cheats, and their lack of consequence to what we mean to them, and how we're going to feel, just belittles what we mean to them, I am a cheated on wife, even though we never actually married, but back in 2007 he was on multiple "Adult friend" sites, he turned that addiction to websites, into 2 "friends" locally, 1 that he took to places we loved, and frequented, and even camping at the national park, the other was a "cumslut" and I found their emails on our computer. I stayed, stupidly, and have tried to forget it, and move on. However every time he betrays my trust, and plays with phones, and texts (we've blocked the internet on his phone and we can't have internet at home), he's blamed his brain injury and depression, and various other physical reasons why he did what he did. now I don't trust him, and we don't have an intimate relationship, and every time he loses the plot over one thing or another he brings it up, and blames my lack of trust, and not being able to get over it, its true, and I was in denial, and now I think more and more I hate him.

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