Infidelity Support Group

Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...

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/ Infidelity Support Group

Is there anyone that may be able to help?

Wonderous
Wonderous
Or at least point me in the right direction...I am going to make this simple: after being on/off again for 15 years and actually together the last 6 years and married the last 4 years, my husband decided to kick me and our 4 year old son out and have a sexual relationship with the neighbor troll. It lasted about 2 months. She didn't want to commit to him the way he wanted. So he came back to me. And I took him back.

There is such a story book behind it, I don't even know where to begin. But I am desperately seeking someone I can talk to about this, that actually understands the emotional rollercoaster you ride after being put through affair hell. 1 minute I feel I'm married still and the next I am suicidal and feel there is no way out from this marriage with a decent future. I just don't know what to do. I know a lot of people are going through the infidelity stuff as well and i just really need someone to talk with and share stories. I am losing it on my end without knowing anyone that has been through anything I have been through. Please someone help, I am more than willing to even chat through this posting. I just need someone who feels the same to talk too! =( Thank you in advance.
deleted_user
deleted_user
My story is not like yours but I am more than willing to listen and share, pm me.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am going through a similiar situation. My husband is having an affair after 26 years of marriage. He is with her now. I know the heart ache, gut renching pain. I have cried myself to sleep for 2 months. Lost almost 25 pounds and am now on anti anxiety meds. If you need to talk, I will listen. through chats or message whatever you need
Wonderous
Wonderous
agame and tryingtoowin, thank you... i'm msging' you. maybe we can help each other and i appreciate anything and everything before hand. (rare one in the world, im learning) =)
pinkpony66
pinkpony66
I would strongly reccomend counseling both individual as well as marital. This situation sounds like it is multi faceted and complicated.

The pain of infidelity is horrible and difficult to deal with even under the best circumstances.

I hope that you find the support you need and the answers that can help you heal.
Wonderous
Wonderous
Thank you pinkpony. I agree...counseling may be what I need. It's hard financially right now, ya know? I have made it this far as well, 3 months: no drugs/counseling. etc. I just need people to talk to, to get to the next step in my life. I hate him but love him sometimes. It's hard. =/
deleted_user
deleted_user
Coming here is one of the best things you will ever do for yourself. The people who have been through it are the ones who will understand and be able to guide you through the days and months ahead. We find that many people who have not experienced infidelity, have little patience for our need to vent and sometimes just cry. The shock of it all will last for a long time. The road to recovery is long and often painful. There is no quick fix and if thats what you are hoping for, you are going to be disappointed. Even at 2 years post d day (discovery day) , I have moments of sadness and still cry at the thought if his betrayal and the memory of the anguish. There is light at the end of the tunnel, regardless of which path you travel. You will find comfort and support here, so we are ready to listen when you are ready to talk.
deleted_user
deleted_user
The stories are always different..... the common factor is the betrayal and the pain that goes along w/ it. We all had to dig ourselves out of the hole of depression and it ain't easy. There is hope after an affair, no matter whether you work it out or not. Just don't make it all about him. Work on you and picking yourself back up. Keep posting and get those feelings out. It's good to talk to ppl who's DD is recent like yours and also ppl that are further out who are getting their strength back. I'm 20 mos out. I soooo remember the pain. It was so big I thought I could never overcome it. But, I did and am stronger and wiser now. You will get there too.
deleted_user
deleted_user
1) Get counseling-definitely individual and perhaps marriage
2) Consider anti-anxiety or anti-depressant meds (they help!)
3) Understand that it gets better over time. Suicide is a long term solution to a short term problem and not the answer. Think about your 4 year old and how much he needs you. Show him that you can be strong and survive trauma.
4) Understand that others have had a similar storybook, some worse and made it through this (both together through reconsiliation and through separation). Read read read what others have posted. There are success stories out there.
5) You have support here. Take advantage of it.
silla00
silla00
I'm so sorry to read your post. I know how truly horrendous this is.

I can't agree more with CantBeHappening: this is a wonderful place to receive the kind of support you need. It is so difficult for people who haven't been through this to truly get the devastation and trauma. The betrayed spouses here have all been through the same thing and are at different stages in their recovery. Please do continue to post here and reach out as it's a great place to feel truly heard and understood and to get some great advice.

Sending you love and support at this enormously difficult time.