Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
So after I sat up most of the night crying as my H sleep. I realize it is him who will need to give me a reason to stay if the baby is his. I have every reason to leave and had tryed for the last 9 months, but now it is his turn.............Why, do I have to loose sleep? Why, do I have to feel like I am dying? Why, Do I want to be saved? and they are perfectly ok with the sitution, it just isn't fair............
Did any of your H give you a reason to stay or did you stay out of your own choice?
Oh, Also I have to deal with my H ex-wife throwing this in my face every chance she gets. She has now become friends with the OW, just to make my life hell and she wants to tell their 12 year old about her new brother or sister, even before a DNA test is done? WTF does she not care about her kid? Lets forget that the OW lives with her H and kids.
I am so much better then all of this, and it is time that I get put first and treated the way I deserve to.
Did any of your H give you a reason to stay or did you stay out of your own choice?
Oh, Also I have to deal with my H ex-wife throwing this in my face every chance she gets. She has now become friends with the OW, just to make my life hell and she wants to tell their 12 year old about her new brother or sister, even before a DNA test is done? WTF does she not care about her kid? Lets forget that the OW lives with her H and kids.
I am so much better then all of this, and it is time that I get put first and treated the way I deserve to.
....... you are not the only one and I am sorry you are hurting.
You are right the spouse should be the one who is giving the reason for you to stay. It didn't happen that way for me either. She turned it around is some respects. I ws the one who treated her poorly. (what do you expect when I knew she was doing what she was doing)
None the less the burden was on me, there were two reasons I stayed. My daughter (it is clear that courts side with the mother, and I can't miss her growing up in the same home as well as the trauma to her of a broken home, I had made a commitment or vow if you will when we were married. I was raised to keep my promises.
Not all people care for their children, the evidence is on TV all the time.
You didn't choose to do this to yourself! My suggestion is focus your efforts on your children and take care of yourself go do what you enjoy (treat yourself as it were) and don't let THEM drag you down your kids do depend on you. You are the better person!
Soulstorm
The ball is in the selfish, weak, morally bankrupt, character flawed, cheaters side of the court.
Prayers for us ALL!
do you work..that would make that harder.
when will the test be done?
if he is ok with the kids being his....I dont think i personally could have that in my face every day. it is not the childs fault but if it is his...you will have constant contact between her and your h for the rest of your life and that is alot to burden for him....
why did they break it off?
do you think this is a ploy of the ow to keep him in the picture...ow lie pathologically..that is what makes them good cheaters.
you are the only one that can really answer the question if you can take this.
do you share kids with him.
personally if i didnt, i would leave him.
if i did have kids with him,i would have to think about the long haul for myself....
and have to ask myself if he truly loved me.
sit down and write on a piece of paper..your pros and cons and see which one out weighs the other....
then maybe i would wait until the test is done and have my mind made up what i was going to do that day if it was his.
such as ifyou are going to leave,i would already have my bags packed before i heard the answer so i could load up by car or have his bags packed so i could kick him out.
then if it is not his and he sees what almost happened...it may make him think long and hard before he is deceptive again.
you have to earn his respect back and being cheated on his being too giving and selfless and you get taken for granted that you will always be there no matter what and i am sure you lost respect for him to when this happened.
if nothing else...i would make him respect me and i would respect my self and my power in the postition...not just his.....
take back control over your power....
and your voice in your life...
and your voice in your decisions.
actions are stronger than words.
talk is noise to them...so it will take
something drastic for him to pay notice and not forget it.
if men could not get played, they would not end up in these situations...
remember you can play him too...
I here are some answers to your questions....
The DNA test will be done sometime this month, if the ow will allow it. Right now she is hidding from us. (There is a chance the baby is her H). No, my H and I do not have any kids together, I have 3 from my 1st marriage and he has 1 from his. I can not have anymore, nor do I want anymore. If the Baby is his, then he wants to be a part of its life.
This is the hardest thing I have had to deal with. Its hard because when I am in my H arms everything goes away, but I can't stay there forever. I will not allow that kid to get close to me, because of everything that happend. You see the day they supposely made that kid, I went to the ER for pelvic pain and got addmitted over night, H was home alone and did even visit me in the hostpital, cause he was to busy making baby in my home. All the lies that were told for the next 3 weeks and the pain I was in. HE was so selfish. At one point he told me he did not want to loose her. I will always think of that everytime I see babies. Hell they have me so messed up, I can't even stand to be around little kids, I want to be mean to them and that is not fair to me because I love kids. I shouldn't have to feel that way. It feels like the im the only one being punished.