Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I have been with my current boyfriend for 6 months..about two weeks ago I cheated on him. I have no idea why I really did it. In the end I realized i never wanted to do it even while in the middle of the act whixh only later about 60 seconds. 60 seconds to ruin something great. Background story I'm chronically ill and because of that ive alwats been sheltered and never acted out of any kind..this feels like me trying to see if i could be rebellious..I hate myself for it. I want to tell my boyfriend but I know he will end it and walk away and i wouldn't blame.him but I cant lose him because i love him so much. He is the one i want to spend forever with and i know he deserves the truth..i just wish i knew what to do. I want to tell him but I cant lose him. He has picked me up from a.very very dark place and has been there for me through alot of medical stuff for the 6 months we have been together. I really dont know why I did what I did. The guy was my nurse and i told him i never wanted that to happen again and to keep his distance from me. I want to blame what i did on just being human but this is a mistake im going to have to live with for the rest of my life. I learned I never wanted to be this person. I feel like im acting out in someways because im so unhappy about the fact that im so sick..not that there is any excuse for my actions. I feel like im such a horrible rotting piece of scum for what i did. I feel like i deserve anything bad that happens my way. I feel like im going tp hell and that God will never forgive me either. I will never ever ever make this mistake again.
You definitely owe him the truth and as quickly as possible. But be throrough in your apology. He needs the truth for several reasons. Not the least of being truth is required for the reestablishment of trust. Also, if he gets to decide if he can live with your choice. He's entitled to know and choose whether or not to forgive you. I recommend that you setup an appointment with a therapist no matter what to begin exploring for yourself any issues that led to the affair. You can change and transform yourself. If he leaves you, and he very well may, be prepared to do the hard work reforming yourself anyway. A good apology will possibly keep him willing to be in contact with you. From there, expect nothing from him and focus on personal growth. If he sees the changes and the genuine sorrow that you feel for his experience (much more important than displaying the guilt you feel), it is much more likely for him to accept the event and offer you genuine forgiveness.
Beating yourself up is normal, but not helpful. So work through that stage as quickly as possible. What with really be healing for him and you is whether or not you can identify with his experience. Dont try to have him identify with yours, not until survival of the relationship is clear and at the point, he may not even need to know.
Definitely accept responsibility, dont make excuses. And either way, prepare yourself for his decision and build yourself a support group. Safe relationships are essential for personal growth.
I wish you the best!
As such, you boyfriend needs to be told.
You say that you love him but from where you stand. it seems like despite him helping you through dark time and providing love and support, you cheated on him and continue to lie to him for your own sake.
If you entrap him in this relationship with ongoing lying you not only do not love him, but are completely using him to gain a personal support worker whilst betraying him deeply at the same time.
That is more in line with despising someone rather than being loving.
I also agree with reporting your nurse, he is probably getting his fix from any vulnerable patient in the place. Won't be his last if he doesn't get fired.