Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
Part of my story is in my response to Danny. I caught my fiance txeting a client on july 17th. It wasn't until August 31st that she admitted to the A. The OM lives in another town, is divorced and single. The dirt bag had nothing to lose using my fiance. A lot of damage was done getting to the truth for both she and I. However, I decided to stay if I got the truth, which I already knew. Since then I continue to obsess. I see her at the kitchen table texting. I had already seen who she was texting with. I relive everything over and over again. I see them together. I work in the same industry as they. He is a client of my company's and I could run in to him in the future. I visualize that meeting and the result is horrific. I am not a pacifist.
My fiance has admitted shame, guilt, remorse for actions. She has agreed to zero contact with him. She delegated clent responsibility to her employee. I go through her through her phone, email cards. I require her to Skype when one of us is out of town. I know what led to the first and supposedly only sexual encounter and we are agreed on how to avoid simular situations. With all this I am still obessing constantly. How do I stop?
I can not continue to go from kind and loving partner to someone feeling rage, anger, and pain. She is walking on eggshells knowing that anything I see or hear can trigger my mind movies.
I know I can never have what I had, but if is 80 percent of what it was then it is a great thing. I also know that I have to overcome this or one of us will eventually end it. How do you overcome this.
My fiance has admitted shame, guilt, remorse for actions. She has agreed to zero contact with him. She delegated clent responsibility to her employee. I go through her through her phone, email cards. I require her to Skype when one of us is out of town. I know what led to the first and supposedly only sexual encounter and we are agreed on how to avoid simular situations. With all this I am still obessing constantly. How do I stop?
I can not continue to go from kind and loving partner to someone feeling rage, anger, and pain. She is walking on eggshells knowing that anything I see or hear can trigger my mind movies.
I know I can never have what I had, but if is 80 percent of what it was then it is a great thing. I also know that I have to overcome this or one of us will eventually end it. How do you overcome this.
I put in another post that I just had to decide. I've decided that I'm going to move forward because like you all the back and forth is not working. It takes time to get over an affair you have all the details and they actual slept together so getting that image out of your head will be hard if you can do it at all. Like they say once you seen something it can't be unseen. That's why you have to weigh if you want all the details or not.
I wouldn't lose a THING over this guy. If you encounter him don't let him see you sweat and lose your temper. If you want to speak with him do it calmly. He has already taken something from you he shouldn't have and that is the trust you had in your fiance, don't risk anything else.
I'm trying to focus on the good. I still have my up and down moments but I try to not obsess about them. They've done it now we have to figure a way to move forward if that's what we want. I've set my ground rules like you and there will be no second chances for these two. I've made that clear to her and him. If he wants to risk what we have again for a relationship that will amount to nothing that will be his price to pay.
I have triggers and my trigger is Wednesdays, that will NEVER go away because that is when they HAVE to see each other for a meeting every week. That is when they were sneaking hugs and kisses and who knows what else. Also hugs trigger me since they both thought those were the best. How do you go through a marriage with no hugs?
I wish luck