Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I was recently diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis. It's pretty painful and I spend a lot of my day resting. I can't work. 3 months ago I found over 1,000 emails between my husband and his wh..."friend". Now, my husband has had many affairs since we've been married (26 yrs). He's always begged my forgiveness and I've always given it. I can't forgive him this time. This was the girl he broke up with shortly before he met me. I feel like I've been the fake wife all these years. I told him that we need to divorce and he said "well that would be great but we can't afford it, so let's just live in the same house and be friends." I can't believe I married this man, but he's right, with all the doctor appts. and meds. I'm going to need plus the fact that I have trouble opening a bottle of water sometimes, I really don't think I can live on my own. I'm so humiliated.
If there is any way you can find an alternate roommate, someone who, unlike him, has human compassion, and is willing to help you with a few things around the house, I recommend you do that.
He can leave and you can divorce at a later time. Maybe there's other things you can do. For example, I can open a bottle no problem, but my asthma doesn't let me change the sheets on my bed, or do any dusting. We all need help sometimes, and we all have something to give.
I got my divorce through a paralegal company. It was $516 bucks.
We never had to see a judge. 3 visits to this place, and 6 weeks, and it was done. When you make a stand for yourself, you'll feel better about taking charge of your life. Cutting things out of your life that drag you down is a great step. Stressors are bad for your health. HE IS a stressor.
Everything is possible.
You would probably qualify for disability. I hope Betrayed gets in on this one. She would know. Talk to your doctor for help.
You could also qualify for in-home nursing care. There are programs out there.
There is no reason to stay living with a man who wants someone else. To just stay for finances? If you can't do it...if it rubs you wrong...beat those bushes until you come up with solutions.
Sending support, L~
Honestly, I'm not so sure that he would be around when you needed him anyway! He sounds like he can be very verbally abusive, is he? Does he put you down? Tell me more about this so called husband! I'm fuming hot, and I don't even know you or all your circumstances...but he sounds like he thinks that you are there for life...because you need him financially, physically, and probably emotionally.
It's tough enough to have medical problems and issues, but when your spouse doesn't give a damn.....geesh....I'm so sorry for your pain!
But let your fingers do the walking....make some calls in your community. You might be eligible for more than you think which might fill the voids that he thinks only he can fill!!!
I finally realized that because my ex figured I would be around forever, and that I wasn't going anywhere regardless, that he could continue to do what he wanted to do. Errrr, wrong for him!
There is no need to stop at what he said, or even agree.
You can sue him for alimony. You can sue him to keep you on your insurance. There are taxi cab companies that will take you to and from your medical appointments for a nominal or no fee.
You more than likely would qualify for some type of disability payment that you may or may not get IF his income is considered ( and it would be considered if you are married).
Obviously he never heard of equitable distribution or exclusive possession of the marital home. There is a chance YOU could be awarded the home and have HIM pay for it.
You don't need to be humiliated, but you do need a plan of what and how you are going to do things.
I didn't look up your age, so I am unsure of that- but there are many agencies that work with people based on age also.
If your husband doesn't have insurance, you can qualify for medicaid ( unless his income is too high) and with that, you are entitled to a certain amount of in home nursing hours and free taxi rides, and free drugs, etc.
Your husband is an idiot. He admitted in one big breath that you guys cannot afford a divorce. How sweet. What the FUCK makes him think he can afford a whore then?
The sad part is HE thinks HE has this all under control. He can cheat on you and keep cheating on you, and you? Well, he thinks since you are so sick he can keep doing it ( been there, done that). I mean, my guess is you may have ALOT of bed ridden times- so he is thinking like my ex did "What she gonna do, get out of bed and leave?"
YUH! Your husband is only serving one purpose and one purpose only: to make you sicker.
There has to come a time when you decide that you will sacrifice his tainted and evil help for peace and sanctity. If you are anything like me- once you have a piece of shit out of your life, your symptoms start to improve.
I don't know much about RA, I will admit. This is one of the things they originally thought I had had. They were so very very wrong LOL.
Is it chronic? can it get better? Does it flare up and die back down? I would have to look into it.
Believe and trust me- I know how danged hard it is to leave that little bit of help that you have. But the truth of the matter was he was hurting me more than helping me and clearly taking advantage of the fact that I was sick and disabled. Thats not love. I am not even sure that is human.
good luck to you in whatever you decide.