Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
So, I am nearing up on a year that I found out about the infidelity. August 17 husband called me drunk to say he got a girl 13 years you get then him pregnant she was 3 months. We have been married 11 years together total 15 years. He left to be with her because as he said he could not abandon his child. The girls family disowned her and kicked her out. She was 19 and him 33. She’s never worked in her life and just recently graduated high school. He’s begged for forgiveness and asks for time. Their baby was born feb 27, 2019, a girl. Baby is now 5 months. He calls me everyday. In the morning to say good morning, afternoon during his break and at night to say good night and he texts me throughout the day. He works all day sun-wed and has Thur to sat off. Henormally comes over every sat from 8am-7pm to see our children (we have 2: 10 and 8 year old). I’ve told him to take them but he refuses and say a no because he wants to see me. He says he is only with her now bc she got pregnant that he can’t leave her w an Infsnt baby. Says that he will show me he is a changed man and loves me that he knows he messed up, but he won’t be happy if I’m not in his life. I wonder many times whAt the girl thinks since he constantly looks for me. She k ew he was married with a family and didn’t care. I never look for him or call or text him initiating the conversation, my mother In law says to mke him chase me. He says what he is doing now is helping his daughter and i have days where I go off and say how does sleeping with the mom help the daughter to explain to me to make me understand. He says sex has nothing to do with love. That I know him better than anyone to just give him time that baby is just barely a baby. Manysay just move on but it’s hard because I truly love this man and not ready to move on. I have days where I am I am tired feed up. I’ve told him take all the time in the world but I won’t be here wAiting. I just many times wonder Can men truly do things for their kids. he says it’s for the baby and leaving her stable but honestly is it that? When I say he doesn’t want to leave her he responds with do you honestly believe that? My mom wants me to suddenly go out party meet guys but I was never like that before, so why would I be like that now. I have good days and bad days, but i have 2 kids to support so I everyday go to work to support my kids so they don’t need anything. I just don’t realize how some men can allow the temptation to sleep w a youger girl and in that moment not realize the consequences. The girl is nothing compared to me not on my level and this really screwed my self esteem which I am working on. Just looking for some guidance... is it worth sticking around or how do you know truly in your heart when it’s time to move on?
Honey, you know it is time. Your husband is not husband material, and doesn't sound like good dad material either.
If he wants to support his infant child and her mother, a monthly child support check and hands-on parenting covers his obligations. Living with and continuing to sleep with the mother doesn't.
And speaking of supporting his children, is he offering financial support to your children.
Mom-in-law thinks you should make his chase you and your mom suggests you go out and party?!?
You know one thing for certain - you have two children to support and care for. They are your first priorities. But to be able to take care of them, you have to take care of yourself.
My worthless advice to you - file for divorce. Secure child support for your children. Go forth in life knowing you are a wonderful mother, able to support your children and you are not willing to put your life and your happiness on hold, waiting for your husband to behave like a responsible man, not a confused baby-daddy.
My prayers for strength and grace go to you and your children.
I hope that you work on your confidence and realize that you deserve someone who will truly love you and does not lie and cheat. Once you let go of the weight he is putting on you, you will open up space in your life for so much more.
He has a wife, a family, and a girl friend. Since everyone knows about each other and isn't taking care of themselves first in this situation he is feeling proud of himself.
He is saying the right things to keep everyone inline.
Sounds like he has all the control here.
You just have to decide how do you want to live your life.
A liar and cheater will do it over and over. For him there are no consequences.
Only you can decide how you want your life. What can you live with?
You should seek out counseling.
It will be painful whichever way you go, but only one way leads to you living the life you want.